


First Date

by CaptainTarthister



Series: The Lannisters Are Coming [2]
Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bang City, F/M, First Date, Fluff and Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-09-23 20:20:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 36,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9674510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainTarthister/pseuds/CaptainTarthister
Summary: Sex has kept Jaime and Brienne from going on a first date several times so they try not to. See them fail again and again before succeeding.





	1. My Lady

“Oh, gods!”

“Fuck!”

“Jaime. . .ooh! _Jaimee. . ._!”

“Come! Fuck, I’m—“

“Fuck!”

_“Coming! Fucking Seven, Brienne!”_

“Jaime!”

Brienne squeaked and clung to Jaime with the full strength of her arms and legs, unaware that she was cutting his air supply. Jaime’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as his grunts softened to the faintest gasps. Just when he thought he was going to fucking die in the most satisfying way _ever_ , he felt the wonderful, familiar squeeze of her cunt around his cock. It brought him back from the rising blackness and he slammed his palms hard on the sweat-slick surface of the dining table. Eyes wide and nearly black with lust, he lunged deep. Brienne screamed, she _fucking screamed_ before strangling his cock. There it was. Fucking there it was. Finally. He let out a roar, pumping his hips two more times before collapsing heavily on top of Brienne.

They were both panting, blurry stars dancing before their bleary eyes. Jaime was heavy but Brienne didn’t mind. He actually felt pretty good and he was still inside her. He actually liked to linger like this, resting on her body and still so. . .big. The few sexual experiences she’d had, the men didn’t stay that big for long after coming. They didn’t even linger as Jaime did. She got a quick kiss, one that felt more like an afterthought than desire, before the guy was rolling away and putting his clothes back on. Or sometimes she pushed the guy away and she scrambled back to the security of her clothes, face burning. 

Jaime showed her that not all guys were the same. More importantly, there was no man like him.

He had been showing her this for close to a month yet she still couldn’t believe it. A lot of what was happening was pretty surreal, actually. She dreaded realizing that after inhaling decades-old dust from library books, she’d gone on an insane hallucinatory trip, imagining not just the most handsome, god-like of men to walk this earth, but a relationship with him. The gods couldn’t be that cruel, or were they?

As her breath steadied, Jaime began to move. He raised himself on an elbow, still resting on her body. Sweat-damp golden hair, bright though sleepy-looking green eyes, a chiseled nose, high, sculpted cheekbones and the most adorable dimples. Her hand itched to caress his elegant jaw, even the curve of his sexy ear. Jaime Lannister was that handsome. And right now he was looking at her as if she were the only woman that mattered. Her heart rate began to pick up again and as he smiled, she knew he could feel it thundering under his chest  
.  
“Hey,” he said

She blushed, pale eyelashes fluttering. “Hi.”

He looked very pleased. And smug. Suddenly realizing just how naked they were, that she was really naked on his dining table, she started to squirm. Jaime pulled himself back but made a great show of innocently rubbing against her before rolling to the side. By the time he was lying down beside her, her breath had sped up again. Brienne turned to her side, suddenly wishing herself dead. Gods, must she always be so transparent? She was nearly thirty years old. Shouldn’t she have a little finesse in post-fucking behavior? Be a little cool? 

“Shit,” Jaime suddenly spoke up, startling her. “That was. . .”

Brienne bit her lip.

“Seven hells,” he continued and she imagined him shaking his head. “Brienne, that was fucking unbelievable yet again. _Wow._ Fucking you gets better each time.”

She was a little used to his crudeness. Jaime had warned her before he wasn’t the guy to utter phrases that belonged in greeting cards or “a besotted knight’s sweet words.” He was straight to the point, which meant his compliments were either crude or downright vulgar. Maybe she should be horrified and embarrassed but she loved it when he complimented her on her tight, very wet cunt or how her mouth was perfect for blow jobs. Not that he would ever know.

“It’s so fucking good,” he was still talking. The man talked way too much. “That we’ve missed our reservation again.”

Brienne blushed so hard, then. Again. They have missed another reservation because they spent the night fucking again.  
Was this lust? Brienne had only read about desire and she supposed she knew how it was to be satisfied but. . .the craving for Jaime was something else. When he was in the room, her mind reeled to the times they’ve been horizontal, or vertical but with pants down, or when one of them was and the other upright. If she wasn’t remembering getting fucked against a wall, she wondered how it was to fuck Jaime on a park bench at night, or to take him on the desk in her study carrel back in the university library. It wasn’t like her at all. She had sex before! 

But it was nothing like this. Nothing came close to what they had.

She heard Jaime get up and off the table. She turned to look at him over her shoulder and saw him zipping up his pants. He had been wearing an immaculate, starched white shirt and a black suit jacket when he opened the door earlier. Clothes look really good on Jaime but it was when he was out of them that he was totally devastating. Those shoulders. That chest, rippled and tight with muscles. The damp mat of golden hairs that trailed down his defined abs. Brienne reddened as he cunt swelled and she sat up.

Her camisole, a vivid blue one, was ruined, crumpled and soaked with sweat. She looked around frantically for her underwear and the pants she was wearing but they were nowhere around. Just as she contemplating the really embarrassing notion of walking around Jaime’s apartment with her wet cunt hanging out, he straightened up. He had been crouched under the table and had discovered her panties there.

Brienne was flushed to her neck when she recognized the panties he held. “Uh, Jaime, those panties went missing last Tuesday.”

“Oh, really?” He asked with a grin, inspecting the scrap of white cotton. It had a demure pale blue ribbon in front. He looked absolutely delighted at her red face. “Now I remember. I lent you my boxers.”

She had been sleeping over at Jaime’s more than at her studio apartment. He had offered her more than ample closet space but she still didn’t make use of it, shy still and thinking he was only being polite. But Jaime’s penchant for tossing away her underwear in random areas in the house wasn’t exactly polite. She suspected he lost her panties on purpose. He didn’t seem to mind lending her clothes, though. He looked happy but that was only wistful thinking.

“Um, I’ve already laundered it. I just forgot,” she said, keeping her legs close. Oh gods, her bottom was sweaty too and she was leaving marks all over his dining table. Her ass marks were all over his priceless dining table. She would get up if only it wasn’t so embarrassing.

“I hope you don’t mind,” Jaime said, “but you can keep it, if you want. I’d certainly like to keep this,” he said, clutching her panties, her used panties to his chest. Brienne’s mouth fell open, mortified.

 _“What the fuck for?”_ She blurted out.

Nonplussed, he retorted, “Why not?”

“Jaime, it’s not exactly clean.”

He grinned. “Nope.” Her eyes widened when he brought her used, three-day-old panties to his nose and took a deep whiff. “ _Fuck. Yes._ If the Maiden’s cunt had a scent, it would be sweet like this.” 

“That’s—that’s—Jaime—“ Brienne was so stunned at his outrageous statement she couldn’t form a coherent sentence.  
Amused, Jaime leaned forward and kissed her deeply on the mouth. Despite her head swimming, she kissed him back ardently. She clutched at his shoulders while he cupped her face, as if she were delicate and beautiful. Another wistful thought. Being Jaime made her wish for a lot of things about herself, things that she knew would never be true. He loved her. He had said two weeks ago, and would tell her first thing in the morning, whether she slept with him or back in her apartment, through text. Brienne had been told she was loved before but it was only Jaime she believed. 

“I can’t believe,” he whispered, pulling away a little, smirking when she whimpered in protest. “That after all this time you’re still so shy. So proper.” He played with the hem of her camisole before his hand lowered to her thigh. She gasped, realizing too late she had opened her legs as they kissed and now he was standing between them. “You’re practically naked and look at those blushes. You’re making it very hard for me to not have you again, honey.”

She blushed and shrugged. “I’m sorry. I’m. . .I’m new at this.”

“So am I.”

“No, I mean. This. What we have. This relationship. The, um, fucking.” Brienne hated how her face still warmed. Jaime looked pleased. “Jaime, I’ve not had anything like this before.”

“I should hope so.”

“No. You don’t understand. I’ve never had anything like this. It’s. . .I’m not complaining but I worry that I’m disappointing you. You’ve had more experience so. . .if there’s something you’d like for me to do, just tell me, okay?” She asked him. “I don’t want to displease you.”

Jaime looked confused. “Why would you think that?”

“You’ve had. . .you’ve been with other women.”

“So?”

Brienne hated to say it but she did anyway. “Well, you have things you like done to you. Things that I probably don’t know about. Or maybe things. . .you’d like to do. . .to me.”

Jaime narrowed his eyes at her then shook his head. “Brienne, let’s get this out of the way. What hurts you or make you uncomfortable in any way would certainly displease me. Remember that. Know that nothing you will do would ever be disappointing to me. Whatever it is that you think I’ve done with other women,” he made a face, “I don’t look for it with you. It’s different with you and I love how different it is. You’re the only woman I said I love you to merely two weeks after we’ve been. . .” he frowned. “Fucking.”

“I—I don’t mind.”

“I do.”

Brienne held her breath. It’s over. Jaime looked like he wanted to bash his head on a wall.

His next words surprised her.

“I love you, Brienne. But I haven’t been treating you the way you should be treated. You’re the woman for me and I haven’t even taken you out for dinner.” Jaime spat the last sentence. 

“We have dinner here. That works fine with me.”

“Not with me.”

“What do you mean?”

This time, Jaime gave her a small smile. “Maybe it’s because of the ten years between us, honey, but I was taught to treat my woman like a lady. I think we can both agree that’s not how I’ve been treating you.”

Yet being fucked by Jaime made her feel the most womanly for the first time in her life. His kisses showed her she could be the kind of woman she never thought to be. She didn’t care about being a lady. Jaime did, though. 

Brienne squirmed, biting her lip. Jaime kissed her on the cheek and reached under the table again, retrieving her pants. He handed them to her and she draped them across her lap. Jaime smirked and sat down beside her. 

“I-I like it,” she confessed.

“I know you like it,” Jaime said arrogantly. “That doesn’t mean it’s right for me to maul you like a bear every time. Or fucking you on your doormat. You’re my lady, Brienne. I do want to take you out to a fancy dinner. I want to bring you to the movies, take you dancing if that’s what you want. Have as much lobsters as possible with you in the most expensive restaurant in King’s Landing. Not to say that I won’t ever fuck you on some rug or furniture we shouldn’t fuck on but I want to treat you right. I love you and I want you to know that I respect you.”

“But it’s not like we haven’t tried,” Brienne pointed out. They have been trying to go out on a first date since the night he first brought her to Casterly Rock—a day after they first fucked. “I mean . .I’m not really crazy about going out.” _Because I don’t have anything proper to wear unless it’s for pizza._ “I would much rather be here with you, having post-coitus omelet.”

“That’s sweet, Brienne, and means a lot. But it’s not right that we. . .well, no. It’s right. Fucking you is the rightest thing in the world, next to loving you. But I don’t want you thinking someday that I couldn’t be bothered to take you out. I certainly want to. Will you let me?”

Brienne looked thoughtful. She did want to go out with Jaime. It was sweet of him but. . .she could only imagine the kind of attention they’d get when out in public. _What’s a hot guy like him doing with somebody like her? Brienne knew what she looked like. She wasn’t just unattractive. She was ugly and made more so with her twice-broken nose, freckles, her mannish height and flat chest. For reasons she had yet to understand, Jaime wanted her. _Loved her.__

“How are we even going to manage it? We’ve been trying and trying, Jaime. Somehow we always end up. . .” Her voice trailed off.  
He grinned. “Fucking.”

Against the wall. On the floor. On the table. Against the window. The couch. The bathtub. . .

“Yeah.”

“Do you, um,” he looked hesitant and a little nervous. “Do you want us to stop fucking. . .a lot?”

“Er, not really, no.” Brienne felt her cunt swell again in anticipation. She didn’t feel right anymore when she went too long without fucking Jaime. 

“So we keep fucking.” Jaime sounded relieved. “We just have to figure out how to go on a first date without being waylaid once again by each other.”


	2. Another on the List

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime in love and in lust.

Aside from pies and cakes, Hot Pie also served other pastries. Jaime held the door open for Brienne, taking an appreciative whiff of her as she walked past. She didn’t leave clothes in his apartment unless he pretended to ‘lose’ them but at least she was making use of the shelf space in the bathroom. They have been together for a month and Jaime was discovering lots of things about her every day. Things that made him fall harder, as if he hadn’t already fallen hard enough.

He couldn’t get enough that his girlfriend was an intriguing mix of shy and. . .fierce. She was Maiden and Warrior. She conquered him in and out bed and the headiest thing was, she had zero awareness. Getting your girlfriend naked was fun but with Brienne it was a kind of pleasure that approached art. Every kiss, every inch of fabric removed bared more freckles and led to deeper blushes. A living canvas, that’s what her body was. She got shaky and bit her lip too much but when she took a deep breath and aimed those awesome blues at him, by the gods, she practically killed Jaime in bed. It was amusing and a fucking huge turn-on watching her struggle to swallow the moans and cries he was desperate hear from her. Then she did the switch, commanding him to fuck her hard. Jaime liked to fuck rough and years of being with delicate socialites and models meant he had to put a lid on this urge. Brienne’s muscles and her unbelievable strength had unleashed him for the first time and _gods,_ he couldn’t get enough. An added bonus was she enjoyed rough sheet play too.

Brienne didn’t look feminine and she wasn’t that inclined to interests usually associated with her sex. She was no-frills, a damn refreshing change from women who were coiffed and perfumed to death, who shrieked when caught without makeup. Brienne didn’t wear make-up except for lipstick during Friday dinners at Casterly Rock, wore no perfume, only soap. It made Jaime’s head spin how _good_ she smelled with just her vanilla soap. That was all she used. Soap. And the woman smelled fucking good everywhere, like warm vanilla pastry all over with the sweetest, rarest cream.

She also had the _most beautiful_ cunt.

Her pubic hair was thick and dirty-blond, rough and springy. She could probably wax the corners or at least trim the hair but Jaime liked her cunt because it was a woman’s cunt. Soft and so very wet—the slightest kiss got her damp and when he really gave it to her, she got _soaked through_ her pants, sometimes even the surface she was sitting on. Jaime absolutely enjoyed going down on her because of this and her scent was strongest there. She was also incredibly tight. Brienne was no virgin but even when she dripping, she had to spread her legs widely just for Jaime to get the first few inches of his cock inside.   
It was criminal, really, for Brienne to cover her cunt with anything that wasn’t his hand, mouth or cock. Or to cover her body. She was hard and so strong, the sexiest human to walk the earth.

Every time she spoke he wanted to kiss her. Especially when she called him an idiot. Her wide, thick-lipped mouth was practically pornographic. When her voice flitted out, even when she was talking about something as mundane as cornflakes, he was enthralled. He could listen to her for hours read a grocery list, or even discuss High Valyrian poetry. He had no interest in the latter and didn’t speak the language but her enthusiasm and passion hooked his attention easily. Her beautiful sapphire eyes got brighter when she got into the subject—how was he going to look away from that? Why would he pay attention to someone else when it was Brienne talking? 

She was smart. Very smart and quick. Jaime wanted to applaud when she would switch discussing the ocular imagery in High Valyrian poetry to why a burrito could never be a burrito without guacamole and why anyone who thought pineapples belonged on pizza deserved a long, painful death before veering suddenly to the strong ties of economy and maritime trade to the evolution of Essosi literature. It was glorious to watch, a privilege, really, to witness.

She also cared little for his name, his lineage. Never hesitated to call him out or say he was ridiculous. Jaime didn’t realize how annoying and boring it was when women cared more about fucking him because he was a Lannister until Brienne. She would roll her eyes every time he whipped out the plastic and made it no secret that his fortune only meant money and a leg up in the world, but no more. 

Jaime followed her as she fell in line before a counter. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he nuzzled her ear before biting it gently. She breathed sharply, stiffening for a moment before relaxing in his arms. Her skin was suddenly warmer. 

“Jaime?” She asked him, her voice a little shaky as he continued nibbling on her ear and licking the sensitive spot below it. Goosebumps decorated her freckled, pale skin. “We’ve had breakfast here before. This counts as a date, shouldn’t it?”

Jaime pulled away from her briefly so she could turn around to look at him. Hot Pie had wide open spaces and high ceilings so the place was bathed in golden sunlight. Brienne’s hair looked paler, a somewhat messy cloud piled on her head. The heavy-lidded gaze of her beautiful sapphires indicated the little sleep she got last night. She was wearing one of his shirts, a white silk with navy pinstripes and her pants from last night.

“I suppose,” he said carefully, considering it. “But it’s not really, you know, special.”

She pinked and looked at her shoes. “I do like it when we have breakfast here. It _is_ special.”

“I’m not saying it’s not, um, special, but it isn’t the kind of special you deserve. We can have croissants anytime. If we’re lazy we can just make the coffee ourselves. A date is one where you make an effort for the person.”

“I don’t know,” Brienne turned away as they advanced towards the counter. “I don’t really want you making such a fuss.”

“Ah, but I want to,” he whispered, sliding his hand under the shirt and caressing her stomach. “And I like fussing over you, my tall drink of honey.” 

“Jaime,” she admonished him but making no move to remove his hand. “We’re in public.”

“See, if this is a special date, I would make the effort to not touch you as I’m doing now. I would _try_ to be a gentleman.” He sounded as if in pain.

She laughed and looked at him over her shoulder. His green eyes sparkled with amusement. “You have an answer for everything, don’ you?”

When it was their turn, they made their order, a basket of half a dozen pastries consisting of chocolate croissants and cherry Danish, then coffee. Jaime steered Brienne to a booth in the corner. They had enough privacy for him to whisper really naughty and crude stuff in her ear, making her blush. And if she allowed it, he could slip a hand down her pants or under the shirt. Jaime settled for his hand on her knee, however. Brienne was already so red from his earlier attentions that he worried he’d set her on fire or something.

“I like how we do things,” Brienne told him. “I understand what you want but. . .it’s so much trouble.”

Jaime cocked an eyebrow. She was always trying to convince him to not do anything for her, he’d noticed. Trying a different tactic, he drawled, “So you’ll never go through any trouble for me?”

She shook her head. “That’s not what I was saying.”

“Well, that’s what I hear.”

“I’m sorry,” she said quickly, flushing and Seven Bloody Hells, his cock was murdering him. “But you’re right. It does seem I don’t want to put any effort for you. I want to, of course, it’s just that . .” her cheeks turned to the color of apples. “I haven’t. . .it’s been years since I was out with somebody, Jaime. I don’t know how to behave, what to say. What not to say.”

“You do know how to chew with your mouth closed and how to use the silver,” Jaime said, barely containing his laugh. That’s what she was worried about? How cute. 

Brienne pinched him lightly on the arm. “You’re terrible.”

Jaime believed in honesty but he could be cautious with his heart. Still, he said, hoping he didn’t sound too needy, he whispered, “You still love me.”

To his surprise, Brienne dropped her eyes on her lap. As he felt his body turn cold, she looked up. Her eyes had softened and her cheeks the color of raspberries. She took his hand and a sizzle of something akin to electricity went through Jaime. _Dear gods, she was only touching his hand._ But Brienne was shy and still had to be coaxed to initiate every once in a while. Jaime gulped, wondering if this was the last time.

“I do,” she admitted, in a tone that conveyed helplessness and certainty. “Yes, Jaime, I do.”

There would never be enough sugary pastries nor chocolates to rival the sweetness of her declaration. Nor the shy kiss she bestowed him after taking a loud, deep breath, and the silent prayer for courage from her lips. 

And Jaime added another reason to his growing list why he loved her.

 

Jaime’s sports car whizzed through the gates of King’s Landing University-Westeros, gliding on the roads and turning with elegance and grace on corners and curves as only its driver knew how to do. Much sooner than he liked, he was parked in front of Brienne’s building and she was unbuckling her seatbelt. He stopped her from moving any further with a hand on her knee.

“Hold on. Let me do this right.”

“What do you mean?”

He grinned, kissing her on the lips then sliding out of the car. The moment he stepped out, the women walking past turned to smile at him, the high wattage of their trained smiles more blinding than dazzling. Some men grinned at him while the rest glanced at him curiously. He was wearing mirror aviators, a white shirt rolled to his elbows, flat-front, slim-fitting deep navy trousers and loafers. He walked around the front of the car, shooting a flushing Brienne a smile before he pulled her door open.

“My lady,” he murmured.

Brienne blushed, shifting and turning to get her endless legs out of the car. Jaime’s smile widened and it was so worth waiting until she was upright and tilting her head down at him. In the sun, her cheeks looked so red she seemed burned by its glare. Jaime nuzzled her neck before whispering against her cheek, “I’ll miss you.”

“It’s only for a few hours,” she whispered back. Then her eyes widened and she stammered, “Um, uh, we’re seeing each other tonight, right?”

Being that they have been seeing each other every night since he first fucked her against his kitchen counter, it was a question she shouldn’t ask anymore. But Brienne was always a study of contrasts. Bold yet unsure, helpless but willing, strong but vulnerable, rough and fragile, soft and sturdy. Jaime put his arms around her waist, enjoying the strength of her body, the warmth of her skin. He inhaled, drowning in her gentle vanilla scent. 

“Unless you don’t want to,” he said, attempting to joke. “But even if you don’t want to I hope you’ll let me try persuading you.” _I don’t know how to sleep without you anymore. I don’t like waking up without seeing your messy hair or your beautiful eyes first. Don't make me say it. I love you but it scares me how much I fall harder for you everyday. I might scare you away._

“How should I dress then?”

Jaime was momentarily confused. He almost blurted out, “Freckles,” when he realized what she meant.

“Hmm. Something soft,” he said, hand skimming her stomach again to play with her belly button. Brienne gasped and looked around wildly. Jaime put a hand on her cheek to keep her head turned to him. “Something that shows off your legs, maybe?”

Brienne was trembling as his thumb circled her innie belly button. “S-Something nice?”

 _Something that would look way nicer on the floor._ He nodded. “Yeah. Something nice. Surprise me.”

She was clearly considering this before nodding. Jaime rested her forehead against hers. “I just want you, Brienne. You can show up in a potato sack for all I care. You’re all that I want and I wish to spend time with you, treat you like the lady you are.”

“I’m no lady.” She sounded resigned, apologetic.

“You have a dirty mouth in bed,” he agreed, enjoying her shock and blush. “You look like someone who can split me in two. You’re right. You’re no lady. But you’re definitely a woman. _My woman._ ”

Then he rubbed his erection against her. Brienne squeaked and jumped out of his arms. Head turned and she composed herself, just barely. “Jaime, oh gods!”

He chuckled despite his condition. “See what you do to me? If you were a proper lady, I doubt if I’d be like this.”

She continued stepping away from him, nearly backing into a bespectacled student with a tower of books under his chin. “Jaime, I should go.” She sounded desperate. “But I got it. Something nice. That will surprise you.”

 _Sapphire eyes, freckles and cunt. That’s all I wish you’ll have on._ Gods, what was happening to him? He was thinking and behaving like a fifteen-year-old who had inhaled Vigor. It was a miracle Brienne wasn’t screaming her head off and calling him a pervert. Screaming her head off that he was a pervert before breaking his nose, actually. _Control, Lannister._

“If it helps,” he told her, “I’ll love whatever you manage to scrounge up. I love you, Brienne Tarth.”

Brienne’s eyes widened and Jaime flushed. His voice had carried clear across and the people who overheard turned to either laugh or hoot. But Jaime Lannister was not a man who embarrassed easily. He stood smug and challenging, enjoying the explosion of pink from Brienne’s pores before she practically ducked and ran. 

Jaime didn’t like it when women left but Brienne? Very much. If only to see that fucking, sexy backside. That high tush of hers and her legs should be visual treats that charged hundreds of gold dragons.

Then he groaned. They were going on a date. A proper date. When was the last time he’d been on one? One thing he knew, he’d never been with a woman whom he couldn’t get enough of. He needed help. 

And with that, Jaime got back in his car and raced to the administration building.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vigor is the equivalent of Viagra in this world. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! I think I can be done this week. I'll upload another chapter tomorrow.


	3. Relationship Status

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brienne tells Jon about Jaime.

Professor Catelyn Stark didn’t have assigned seating but students nevertheless stuck to where they sat from the first day. Brienne gazed wistfully at Renly’s empty seat. He had dropped out of his classes and settling the rest of his school affairs before leaving for Dragonstone at the end of the week. She sat down heavily next to Jon Snow.

Jon had been napping, a cap over his eyes when she sat down. Hearing her, he plucked it off his face and grinned at her roguishly. “Hey, Tarth,” he said, straightening up. “You look so fucking fine as always. Who did you fuck last night?”

Brienne decked him on the head with her notebook and flipped it open. “Could you not? It’s too early.” She reached in her bag for a pen, then, blushing, retorted, “Why, did you fuck someone last night?”

“Nope.”

“Oh, dear,” she put a hand on her heart dramatically before asking, “Did King’s Landing run out of condoms?”

“Not that I know of.”

“Some girl rejected you? Jon, I told _you_ to only date bimbos.”

“Please. And be nice.”

“You’ve gone to the other side? I don’t blame you. Renly tells me they get more action.” She actually blushed. “The things he told me would probably make you blush too.”

“Now that’s something to contemplate about, but no.”

“Are you sick or something? Jon, since I’ve known you, you’re always fucking somebody. Even when you had that nasty cold last year you were still fucking somebody. Do you even have your own place? I’m beginning to doubt it.”

Jon shrugged but smiled. “I just didn’t feel like it, you know. Sometimes I have to give this big boy a rest.” He glanced significantly at his crotch and Brienne blushed. 

“I don’t doubt you’re a boy but the size? From when you made me touch it last time, I don’t think so,” she retorted.  
“Cruel woman. Hey, do you know it’s been weeks since we last had dinner together or just hung out? I just lost my other best friend. Don’t tell me there’s a sequel coming up soon.”

Brienne pinked. He was right. Since the night she and Jaime first fucked, she only saw Jon during class or in the library—they had carrels next to each other. He was an ass who fucked way too much and was probably a walking ad for venereal diseases but he was funny and nice. He teased her too much, true, and could get a tad inappropriate sometimes but she wasn’t bothered. First, he wasn’t interested in her that way. When he made jokes, she knew he wasn’t being mean, he just enjoyed teasing her too much. Sometimes he reminded her of Jaime, come to think about it. 

“I’m sorry,” she said sincerely. “You’re right. I’ve been neglecting you.”

“If I were your dog, I’d say you’ve forgotten about me,” he continued, pretending to wipe away tears.

“Jon, if you were my dog, I’d have dropped you off the pound because you hump everything.” She said. “Be grateful you’re a member of my species.”

Since she was too busy looking at her notes, she didn’t notice him leer at her from head to toe. “Oh fucking yeah. Say, that’s some shirt you’ve got on. It’s nice.” 

Brienne glanced up, suddenly flushing. She had told Renly about Jaime after the first night. Not all the details but Renly had called to check if the outfit chosen for her was successful. Jon had been too busy helping out in a conference. Their group hadn’t really gotten together since the night she got drunk at Ye Old Gods, pulled away as they were in different commitments. She and Jon only met in the library but hardly talked because they had research to do and rush. 

So she could tell him about Jaime but didn’t really want to be teased right now. She hoped to get Catelyn Stark as her thesis adviser and Jon liked to distract her in class with notes, or tugging at her hair, leaning over to write on her notebook stupid stuff like, “I can see Gren’s ass crack, look.” 

But, she had to tell other people than Renly about Jaime soon. They’ve been together for a month. Exchanged I love you’s. Gods, he’d been taking her to dinner at Casterly Rock. She knew his family, his friends. Jaime knew about Renly but had never met Jon.  
Her ears seemingly licked by flames, she muttered, “Er, I borrowed it.”

“You certainly didn’t borrow it from me, Tarth.”

“Of course not. You shop at the little boys’ section of Tobho Mott’s.”

“So?” Jon pushed as Catelyn Stark entered the room. “Spill. Whose shirt is it? A fuck buddy? You have a fuck buddy? Is he big? He must be if you’re going around saying I’m puny.”

Brienne shut her notebook and slitted her eyes at him. “For your information, I have a boyfriend,” her voice dropped to a whisper.

“Is it like, an affair or something? Why the fuck are we whispering?  
”  
“Because class is starting!” Catelyn Stark was flipping through her notes while a graduate assistant hooked up her laptop to a projector.

“Fuck Stark. So this boyfriend of yours, is it a forbidden kind of relationship?” Jon’s gray eyes twinkled.

“Of course not!”

“Is he big?”

Brienne wished she would die as her face was slapped with a sudden red wave. As if that wasn’t embarrassing enough, her nipples pebbled under the shirt and honey spilled from her cunt. She glared at Jon as he grinned slowly.

“Seven fucking hells, Tarth!” At least he was still whispering. “You’re getting a lot of action lately, aren’t you?”

“If you persist in pestering me, you fucking midget, I. WILL. END. YOU.” 

Realizing this was mortifying for her, Jon held up his hands a bit in a gesture of surrender. Catelyn Stark looked up from her notes just then. She smirked.

“Excellent. Thank you for volunteering, Mr. Snow. You will lead our discussion today.”

 

Brienne shouldered her way to the ladies’ room, keeping her head down lest she get more unnecessary attention. She locked herself inside a stall, set her bag down and closed the toilet seat. Blushing heavily, she unzipped her pants and cursed under her breath. 

Her panties were soaked. It was all Jon’s fault. He had to ask about Jaime and his dick size. Well, it was also Jaime’s fault for fucking her so often that she knew how his cock felt inside her very well. And her nipples were so taut and sensitive just from remembering that the silk rubbing them was torture. Her cunt felt empty and. . .desolate. Oh, gods. Jaime Lannister had turned her into a nympho. That’s what. 

She was such a nympho now that she was thinking of touching herself! Gods! Brienne had never touched herself. Until Jaime, she got on fine with life. She didn’t obsess about sex. Didn’t think about making a list and memorizing the items there of the things that made Jaime smile and laugh. She loved making him laugh. Listening to him speak. Jaime had a sexy, lazy drawl that made her think of maple syrup slowly dripping onto a pancake. She got breathless when his dimples followed his smile. Those deep lines were so beautiful she wanted to kiss them. Hells, sometimes, she wanted to lick them. Eat gummy bears off them.  
There was no way she could spend the rest of the day with panties like this. As she stepped out of her shoes then began to shimmy out of her pants, she remembered Jaime declaring that she should always be welcomed by either his mouth or cock in her cunt. It was a wrestle of sorts with lots of laughter and shrieks to get her flat on her ass on the floor, pants thrown somewhere in the apartment, legs up and cunt out and waiting to be flayed by Jaime’s tongue. 

Her face and neck were hot as she tossed the wet panties in the trash bin then pulled her pants back up. Then she groaned, leaning against the door. This was worse! The denim was rubbing her cunt! Reminding her even more that Jaime wasn’t around to fuck her or finger her!

Control yourself, Tarth, she told herself, taking deep breaths. Eyes closed, she struggled from images and sounds from Jaime. There has to be something unsexy or off-putting about him! Something she couldn’t stand! Something to make her hate him!  
His habit serving her waffles, her favorite breakfast food, was going to make her ass bigger than the land mass of Winterfell.

The man looked positively silly whenever air-guitaring as he headbanged around the apartment to one of Drogon’s classic, heavy metal songs.

His giving a tenth of his monthly salary to charity was going to turn him into a pauper someday.

He used too many hair products. His hair was already fucking perfect. Ah. Vanity. Brienne didn’t like vain people.

Who the fuck could be that obsessed with advertising that he’d clipped ads from his childhood and stored them in a box? Brienne could understand stashing away old sports medals but ad clippings? That was trash. He was a hoarder. Not adorable, nope.  
For all she knew, his eyes weren’t the exact shade of emeralds. They were contacts. Had to be. He plucked them out as soon as she was sound asleep. He probably knocked her out too so she wouldn’t catch him popping them in.

He was arrogant. He bragged. He hated horror movies.

He loved romantic comedies. Ugh.

Two and a half bottles of beer knocked him right on his ass. A glass of wine put him right to sleep. This was weakness.  
That body of his. It set unrealistic standards for normal men. Jaime Lannister looked like a god because he could afford exclusive gym memberships, a trainer, a nutritionist. If he didn’t have money, he was just a blond, green-eyed tub of lard.

He went down on her way too much. She shouldn’t like it so much when he complimented her for having the wettest and tightest cunt in Westeros. And what was with grabbing her boobs as they slept? Or having his hand on her cunt when she woke up? He was way too fucking clingy. Brienne liked strong, independent, manly men. Manly men scoffed at rom-coms, didn’t use hair products and made her serve them waffles in bed! Manly men only cared about their pleasure!

Manly men didn’t see her freckles as places to kiss and taste!

Manly men described her eyes as blue, not sapphire!

And only sissy men said “I love you” two weeks after. . .well, after fucking. That was the first and last time Jaime had been manly, when he fucked her against his kitchen counter and made her beg for pizza! What the fuck happened to him? 

He had deceived her.

Lied. Jaime Lannister _lied_. Led her on.

But, she thought, as he was consistent, he was, in fact, being a manly man.

Someone suddenly knocked on the door and Brienne shrieked. 

“Tarth!” Jon said, startling her even more. “You okay there?”

“Jon? What the fuck are you doing here?” She demanded, glaring at the door.

“Taking a piss, what does it look like? Are you alright?”

“You shouldn’t be here! Get out of here!” Brienne picked up her backpack and opened the door. She frowned at Jon. “How did you get the other women to leave?”

He shrugged nonchalantly. “I told them that my girlfriend’s late and figured she’d want the father of her child to be there when she pees on a stick. I swear to the Seven those women just found me more attractive.”

“What?”  
“It was that or I tell them I’m in transition and wish to try out my new vagina. I’ve seen enough porn to know why you women go to the bathroom in herds. While I do love the softer touch of the opposite sex, they might spank my precious junior or worse if they find out right away I’m lying.”

Brienne shook her head and washed her hands in the sink, just because. The warmth from her head had gone down a little. Keeping her head low, she trudged out of the room with Jon following closely behind. They walked down the hallway.

“I came after you to apologize. I know I joke with you a lot but I should have been more respectful of your space, Tarth.” He told her.

“It’s not like I didn’t want to tell you,” she assured him as they walked abreast of each other, Jon trying to match her long strides. “It was the wrong time to ask, that’s all.”

“Yeah, I get it now.”

Brienne glanced at him. “It’s Jaime.”

“Jaime. . .?”

Brienne paused and turned to him. “Remember how I lost my shoe at Ye Old Guys? Well, he found it. And he was doing that photo shoot with the football team when I got hit. We met in the hospital then ran into each other a few weeks later. He invited me to dinner. Don’t you remember? You and Renly gave me advice on what to wear.”

“Jaime. . .” Jon suddenly froze and his jaw dropped. “No fucking way. Jaime Lannister has a big cock?” He demanded loudly. The hallway was empty but Brienne shushed him.

“Shut up, will you?”

“Sorry.” Jon looked like he had been whammed across the head. “Do you men to say that your boyfriend is _Jaime fucking Lannister?_ ”

“Uh, yeah.”

Jon looked at her strangely. In a softer voice, he asked, “Is he like, just you know, boyfriend for now or is it serious?”< /p>

Brienne’s heart began to pound. “He told me he loved me two weeks after that dinner.”

Jon stared at her, his expression unreadable. Brienne bit her lip and shifted her weight from one foot to the next, a habit she fell into when anxious. Why was Jon looking at her like . . .? She couldn’t name it. He wasn’t disappointed, not angry, disgusted or shocked. One thing for sure was he didn’t look happy. 

That put her on the defensive.

“I know it’s fast. The last one. . .Hyle was a cunt but it’s different with Jaime, Jon. He’s. . .it’s hard to describe but things feel right with him? I can’t even say it’s perfect because that word isn’t enough. All I know is everything is right and makes sense.”  
There was a strangeness in being with Jaime. Everything felt right in place, pegs snug in their holes, pairs united. It didn’t mean things were spotless or nothing was out of place. Being with Jaime made Brienne feel that the world was finally as it had always dreamed. It only happened with him.

It may be too soon to say these things, too soon to admit their true feelings to each other. She didn’t have a lot of relationships to teach her much but there were still lessons. One was that she not only deserved loved, but also to be appreciated. Hyle Hunt was her first and she would have been content with him if he hadn’t been such an asshole. It was her fault for letting him back in her life but she needed to learn that lesson harshly, to remember.

That night with her pysch professor’s TA was a mistake. Brienne never obsessed about giving her maidenhead to the dreamiest, sweetest boy. What she regretted about him was she had let her emotions rule her and in doing so hurt them both. He had sent her notes and flowers after that night, all inquiries about her health and she had cried, harder than when she first broke up with Hyle. He clearly cared for her and there was the definite promise of more. But that year she had lost so much that she had nothing to give anymore. Her virginity was the last. 

Jaime came at a time when she was close to happy with her life. She was doing well in school, was well on her way to the life she wanted. Renly and Jon were her best friends. She and her father were getting to know each other for the first time. She wasn’t looking for a way out, didn’t feel she was missing something or anything close to lonely. Living, that was all she was doing. Living and thriving. 

Jaime showed and taught her so much despite being only together recently. He taught her to laugh more, reminded her every day how much he loved her. He didn’t baby her or engaged in any sappy activity that new couples fell victim too. For a man who loved romantic comedies, he was pretty down-to-earth in his approach to their relationship. He treated her like a person and appreciated who she was. That had never happened before, not even with her father. 

Brienne watched Jon compose himself, shaking his shoulders and the storm clouds disappearing from his eyes. He nodded and said, “So it’s really Jaime Lannister?”

“Yeah.” Eager to get things back to normal, she said, “And we’re going on a date tonight.”

Jon nodded and resumed walking. She followed him. “That’s great. That’s great, Tarthy.”

“Thank you. But I need help.”

Jon turned to look at her. “In what way?”

“Do you have any advice on how a woman should dress on her first date?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If this is your first time to read the series, please check out my other works, especially if you're curious about Jon's feelings towards Brienne here. Thank you for reading!


	4. An Imp's Advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime seeks Tyrion's counsel.

While Brienne was in Catelyn Stark’s class, Jaime was sitting on the couch in Tyrion’s office. Tyrion was not happy. He told Jaime right away he had a meeting in half an hour and had to prepare. Jaime scoffed that since he was university president, he didn’t have to prepare anything.

Tyrion let out a long-suffering sigh. “Why do I have a feeling that even if I pull out my best insults you won’t get lost, baby brother?”

“I need advice, come on. Help me out here.”

“If you need advice, you should schedule it with my secretary.”

Jaime shuddered. Tyrion’s secretary was this tall, grim-faced woman named Unella. She had not been pleased with Jaime just barging in.

“You know, if you’ll let me get straight to the point, I won’t take a lot more of your precious time.”

Tyrion, letter opener in hand, sliced through an envelope. “Alright. You have seven minutes.”

“I want to take Brienne out on a date.”

“And?”

“I want to take Brienne out on a date.”

“Why the fuck are you coming to me for this? You’ve brought her to Casterly Rock three times already. Why are you asking advice about dating her?”

Jaime shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Clearing his suddenly dry throat, he looked at the ceiling, the framed display of Tyrion’s advanced degrees, then his shoes. He muttered.

Tyrion, who was reading a letter, looked at him through his spectacles. “Did you actually say something or have I gone deaf?”  
Jaime looked at him, his nose pink. “I said I haven’t taken her out on a date.”

“What do you mean? You’ve taken her out before, right?” Tyrion was confused. 

“Uh, no.” Jaime squirmed and sniffed. “Not exactly.”

 _Because every time I’m supposed to I see something about her or smell or remember and I just have to have her. I can’t help but kiss her and kiss her some more._ Jaime felt his cock stir. _Her cunt is still tight no matter how many times I’ve fucked her._

Tyrion put away the letter and frowned. “I don’t understand.”

“We’ve never gone out.”

“But you’ve brought her home. To meet father. Us. Surely—“

Jaime shook his head.

Tyrion’s mismatched eyes popped wide open. “Are you telling me that a girl you’ve yet to take out on a date met us first? You subjected her to grilling by our fucking father and you haven’t even taken her out? Pray tell that at least you’ve gone to the movies.”

“Nope.”

“Coffee?”

Jaime shook his head.

 _“And she’s still with you?”_ Tyrion suddenly shouted, making Jaime jump in his seat. “Fucking bloody hells, brother. When you inflict Father on a woman you at least take her out to dinner first! And you’ve brought her before him three times! What the hell were you thinking?”

“She’s gonna have to meet him eventually, so why put it off?”

“Eventually?”

Jaime cleared his throat again. “I’m going to marry her.”

Tyrion laughed sarcastically. “You’re going to marry Brienne Tarth when you’ve never even gone out for coffee with her?”

This time, Jaime looked at him right in the eye. So they weren’t doing things in the right order. Somehow it didn’t matter, not when what was going to happen was clear. He had told her since their first morning where they were going and she made no protest. They haven’t talked about it again but she was still with him. Most important of all, she loved him too. Him. Jaime Lannister. A man who was just getting the mud and grime off his name.

“She’s. . .different. It’s not enough to describe her but I knew from the moment I saw her she’s it for me.” 

“Brother, let me remind you that you’ve never been in a relationship before. You have one-night stands, fuck buddies. You’ve never had a girlfriend. That Mormont girl was no girlfriend of yours. She just used you.”

“Well, no. She’s not.” Jaime winced, remembering. “But there was Melara.”

“In middle school!”

Well, it didn’t really count but if Tyrion was going to argue that he’s never been in a relationship, what he had with Melara fell right in that category. She was his first kiss, literally, because she kissed him first. The first time he really kissed a girl was at fifteen years old.

“Perhaps the reason I’ve not had a serious girlfriend after Melara is because a lot of women are boring and predictable. Brienne is intelligent, she’s funny, her eyes are the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. Her legs are incredible and she did very well in holding her own with Father,” Jaime said, getting buoyed with courage as he continued ticking off his fingers his lady’s attributes. “She has the sweetest, sexiest blushes. She’s the best I’ve ever had. In everything.” When Tyrion looked dubious, Jaime glared at him. “In fucking everything.” 

“If she’s the fucking best why haven’t you taken her out on a date? Really, Jaime. That woman is the best you say—“

Jaime narrowed his eyes. “Brienne.“

“For _Brienne_ to still be with you in spite of Father? And you couldn’t be bothered to take her out for a steak dinner or even coffee? Fuck the Seven, Jaime. Never tell people you’re my brother.” 

“You’re not helping. I came here for advice.”

“Just take her out! Lobsters. Steak. The opera. Hells, take her to Braavos for dinner. You’re a fucking Lannister, Jaime. You actually have options. I don’t know why you’re being a stupid boob when you’re clearly in love with Brienne.” Suddenly, Tyrion pointed at him. “On that note, I would prefer if you kept demonstrations of your affection off my campus.”

“What the fuck?”

“I may not be dating Brienne but my brother is. I’m the president of this school and she’s a student. You get what I mean?”

Jaime stared back in disbelief. “Sorry if I’m not getting this right but are you telling me that you might be at risk of some ethical violation or something by virtue of your association with me because I’m dating a student from your school? Brienne’s fucking twenty-eight years old!”

Tyrion was firm. “She’s a student here, nevertheless. It can not appear that I condone or support the relationship in public. I happen to like my job.”

Well, Jaime didn’t want to be the reason Tyrion’s position might be put in jeopardy. But he wanted t make one thing clear too. “I’m not going to stop seeing her.”

“I didn’t ask you to. Only that you practice discretion.”

“You have it”

Tyrion wasn’t done. “So what have you been doing all this time if you’re not having dates?”

Jaime couldn’t help but be crude and proud. “You think she only uses those sexy legs of hers for walking?”

Tyrion was nonplussed. “She kicks you around?” He grinned. “Ah. I knew I’ve always liked her.”

“Haha.”

Tyrion shook his head. “Seriously? You’ve been fucking Brienne all this time? You have done nothing but. . .fuck? Don’t you have a day job?” 

Now that it was somebody else saying it, Jaime was offended. He shot his brother a warning look.

They were fucking a lot, yes. When Brienne slept over, she would be flat on her back from the moment she was past the door. Sometimes they passed the night on a carpet. Fucking her was intense and led to a whirlpool of hunger. There was no end.  
But they had lots of conversations. So what if half the time they were naked and the other just barely dressed? In the kitchen, with her wearing his t-shirt and he pajamas, he asked her about Tarth. Her sapphire eyes sparkled when talking about her uncles. He imagined three, giant, hulking uncles forming a protective circle around a little girl with big, sapphire eyes. Her father, he knew, she wasn’t very close to, since he was often away when she was younger. Brienne wasn’t much of a talker and it took a lot of coaxing from Jaime to show she could trust him with the secrets of her heart. There was still some work to do but he only had to look in her eyes to know that she worried about disappointing her father.  
On the couch with his head on her lap, he asked her for stories about her childhood. Brienne was locked tighter than the most secure vault in the world at first. There was little sweetness to that time, he would learn later, based on the halting way she told them. Forehead scrunching, eyes getting watery, a tremor in her voice and a tensing in her body that made her stiff as a board. So he would tell her his own stories. Neither had an easy childhood due to the death of their mothers and an absent father. But Jaime realized that at least he got to know Joanna even for only a short time. He got to say goodbye to her. Brienne only knew her mother from photos.  
Even when they fucked they talked, sometimes with words, at time just with their eyes and the motions of their bodies. When her sapphires became gleaming black coals, she was delirious with lust, breathless and keening as Jaime took her. Her eyes screwing shut and gasps of his name meant she liked his fingers pinching her nipples, the hard sucking kisses he gave them that left the buds tight and red. A soft bite had her struggling for breath, her spine bowing and arching sharply. “Oh, oh, oh. . .” she whimpered when he opened her legs wide, feasting on the sight of her hairy cunt wet and swollen for him. He knew she wasn’t used to this, probably had never been kissed like this as her body would stiffen during the first swipes of his tongue. He tasted her shock the first time he spread the cheeks of her ass to bury his tongue in her tight pink rosette. Something male and animal stirred in him knowing that there was still a part of Brienne’s body that was untouched until he came along. Being with Brienne gave Jaime thoughts about things he had never done before, let alone thought of doing. 

He crossed his leg over his knee as his cock hardened once more.

Tyrion continued reading the documents on his desk. “Jaime, Brienne strikes me as a very accommodating person. It’s certainly a consistent comment about her from her professors.” He glanced up warily. “Don’t be the idiot who takes advantage.”

“What? Of course I’m not!”

“As president, I make it a point to know as much as I can about the goings-on in this school. For example, I know she was in a relationship a while ago. The precise details are hazy but I know that either Jon Snow or Renly Baratheon made the guy regret it. Renly’s dropped out of the program—you know that—but when it comes to men who don’t treat her right, Brienne still has someone who’ll fight for her even when she doesn’t want to.”

“I love her. Didn’t you hear me?”

“You claim to love her. Or do you just enjoy fucking her?” Tyrion was straight to the point.

Jaime didn’t like being accused of being a liar, let alone stupid. “I know the difference between enjoying riding between her legs and listening to everything she says, even when she calls me an idiot, and still thinking she’s the best thing that’s happened to me.”

“Alright. If you know that, then you should show her. Not enough to tell her, Jaime. Sometimes that mouth of yours needs to be on lockdown. Treat her like a queen or a goddess, whatever.” Just then, the intercom beeped. Tyrion held up a hand and pressed a button. “Yes, Unella?”

“Your nine-fifteen is here, Mr. Lannister.”

“Thank you. I need five more minutes.” Tyrion pressed a button again then turned back to Jaime.

“Take her out on a fucking date soon, Jaime. If Brienne hasn’t made any complaints, it’s probably because she wants to please you. She’s a sweet girl and I know she’s special to put up with someone like you and survive Father.”

“That’s the problem. I don’t. . .” Jaime blushed. He actually blushed. “I don’t know how to be on a date. It’s been so long. I don’t want to fuck it up with Brienne.”

“It’s just like riding a bike, except you have to forget you’re Jaime Lannister.” Tyrion smirked at the puzzlement on Jaime’s face. “Honestly, you’re too much sometimes, baby brother. It’s a wonder Brienne has not run off. You do have a strange tendency to scare women off.”

Jaime scratched his head and stood up. “That’s because they’re dumb and can only read an entire fashion magazine. They’re nothing like Brienne at all. Well.” He headed for the door. “I don’t know if this was helpful. But thank you anyway.”

As he reached the door, Tyrion called him back. Jaime turned and saw Tyrion sitting back on his massive chair. Despite being a dwarf and surrounded by massive furniture, Tyrion Lannister looked powerful. He reminded Jaime of Tywin in some way.   
“If you love her, you’re not going to fuck her after your date.”

_“WHAT?”_

“Trust me.” The door opened behind Jaime and he leaped out of the way as men and women in dark tweed suits entered the room. “Trust me on this, Jaime.”


	5. Give and Receive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff and smut ahead, with some rough sex.

At Jon’s insistence, it was imperative for Brienne to blow off her one other class in the afternoon to go shopping. This was met with much resistance, of course. Brienne detested shopping for clothes. She could spend hours in a bookstore but shopping for anything to wear just killed her. Maybe it would be different if she weren’t six-foot-three and with size twelve feet. Possibly.  
To get a dress that was more than halfway decent and fitted her well, she had to surrender Selwyn Tarth’s credit card. Brienne had her own money from the scholarship stipend and the small salary she was paid doing graduate assistant work. At Selwyn’s and her uncles’ insistence, she had a monthly allowance from them because, well, she was a Tarth. They were not wealthy but rich enough to still maintain Evenfall Hall with generous compensations for its staff so why not extend the same privilege to her? Still, Brienne was careful with money. She didn’t splurge; she only bought new clothes and shoes when needed. And by needed it meant wrecked shoes, for example. Beyond repair. 

She used the allowance provided by her family for rent. If she wanted to afford rent for the next month, she had no choice but to use the credit card. She only hoped her father didn’t have a heart attack when he got the bill. Jon, whose knowledge of women’s clothes were extremely limited to lingerie, had surprised her with his suggestions. “I learned from Renly by Osmosis,” he said when she remarked on it. His mood had improved through the day, and she thought it was because they were spending some time together after so long. Before they parted ways, Brienne asked Jon if he would like to have lunch with her tomorrow. His gray eyes lit up as if she’d just promised to give him the world. It was sincere invitation but his reaction made her feel guilty too, proving that she had been rejecting her best friend.

So she walked, shopping bags in hand, humming happily. Jaime texted her earlier that he’ll meet her at Blackfish, a restaurant so exclusive that only the richest and most powerful in Westeros and a few celebrities could get in. Reservations had to be made a year in advance. Brienne was so used to going over to Jaime’s to meet him that having to go and meet him right on where they’d be having their date was a little strange. 

But at least, he hadn’t offered to pick her up. Brienne wasn’t embarrassed about her apartment but it was a modest walk-up. She loved it but it wouldn’t be Jaime’s taste. At least, when and if she invited him over, she had to fix up the place a little first.

As Brienne was walking, a display at a shop window caught her eye. She paused and looked at it. 

Jaime was kind, thoughtful and sweet. Just days after they exchanged “I love yous” he gave her a key to his place. A key and security codes. As she stared at the paper the numbers were scrawled on in confusion, Jaime piped up.

“I’ve never done this before. But I’d like you to be able to come here without any hindrance.”

Brienne did not have a long history of relationships for reference but she knew that keys and security codes weren’t exchanged so soon. These were earned. They took a long time to never.

“Are you sure?” She asked him, her stomach feeling funny. “I mean, Jaime, you haven’t known me for long.”

He smirked. “What, are you going to rob me?”

She flushed. “Of course not. But. . .you don’t have to do this. Not yet. I mean. . .it’s not. . .”

Jaime halted her stammering with a kiss. She kissed him back. The end of that sentence was never reached because as his cock drove in and out of her, so did every word she knew. When she went home the following day, she went to bed and held the paper containing the security code and the key to her heart. She didn’t have to memorize it. It was engraved in her heart but the small piece of paper and metal were at the moment the most precious things she owned. 

Convenience may have been the only agenda behind the gesture but for Brienne, it also meant that Jaime was letting her in his life. He wanted her to share it. _Someone_ actually wanted her in his life. It was. . .strange. For the first time, she had no idea what to expect. The only thing she was sure about was her feelings and they scared her. She had never loved anyone like Jaime. Hyle was not love, though she believed it at a time. With Jaime, she was learning that love was the sum of all feelings towards a person. Feelings on opposite sides of a spectrum came together under love.

With another look at the display, Brienne entered the shop.

She was quick to make her choice, pointing at the display in the window. The sales associate who entertained her led her further into the shop to show her the item and others of similar design on display. Brienne thought they were all beautiful but she was sure with her choice, pointing at it again. Seeing that she was firm, the associate wrapped up her purchase. Brienne took out the credit card again, reasoning to herself that she wasn’t going to scrimp on a gift for Jaime. He had given her so much. This was a thank-you sort of gift.

Brienne took a cab to Empire Building and asked the driver to wait. Taking her shopping bags with her, she went to the lobby and asked if she could leave a gift for Jaime. The concierge, recognizing her, stunned her with his words.

“Mr. Lannister has left us firm instructions that anything from you should be delivered to his penthouse yourself, Miss Tarth.”

“But he’s not there,” Brienne pointed out.

The concierge spread his gloved hands helplessly. “I’m sorry, miss. But those are his orders. Mr. Lannister doesn’t like anything being left to him and he’s strict about who gets access to his penthouse. And he told us you have a key.”

Ain’t that the truth, Brienne thought. There was an elevator strictly for Jaime’s use. And hers. 

“I have a cab waiting,” she tried again. 

“Frederick shall take care of it, miss. Do you have anything else in the car?”

“I haven’t paid the driver.” Brienne blushed and dug out her wallet. “I mean, really? What if I just come back later?”

“If that’s your wish. I’m sorry but I’m just following his orders, Miss Tarth.”

But they were meeting at Blackfish. So the gift really had to be left for Jaime to find and use later. Her cheeks burned some more as she put a bill on the table with a sigh. “I guess I’m off to his place, then.”

Brienne stomped down the hall all the way to the elevators. She punched in the code that opened Jaime’s elevator, which was programmed to just go to his penthouse. She unlocked the door and and soft, beeping sound of the alarm rang throughout the space. Her fingers were nimble in punching in the five-digit code, pushing ENTER to bring much-needed quiet. 

She left her shopping bags by the door and strode in, looking around. The small box from the shop was in her hands. There was a round table at the center with a large display of winter roses. This was new, she realized. Jaime to her knowledge wasn’t a stickler for floral displays but employed a housekeeper to maintain little but expensive things such as this. All the roses were in full bloom and the color of vivid, rich blue. Their sweet scent was a gentle perfume and Brienne took a whiff. 

Maybe she could leave the box here. Jaime would definitely see it. Still, it didn’t feel right. A box on this table, where the mail was sometimes piled on, seemed to relegate it as nothing more than a delivery. A reminder. But in her hands was a gift. Something to tell Jaime that she appreciated him and loved him. Nope. It definitely didn’t belong here.

Without Jaime around, the palatial penthouse felt cold and austere, like a museum where things were in precise spots and never to be touched. The touches were sumptuous and the furniture and pieces discreet but expensive. Jaime’s taste ran toward functional elegance and comfort, lending a homey touch despite the one-of-a-kind pieces. He didn’t have anything that was just for show. Brienne knew for a fact that every painting in the penthouse was either chosen or commissioned by Jaime himself. If he was going to invest in something that would just hang on a wall, he told her, he should at least like looking but not think too much about it. So there were no abstract or surrealistic art but landscapes and seascapes. 

The wall leading to the bedroom displayed an array of photographs, an intriguing mix of black-and-white shots mixed with colored ones, in various sizes. There were lots of photos of Jaime with his twin sister Cersei, though they weren’t very close, as well as him with Tyrion. Now the brothers were close. At the center was a beautiful photo of Joanna Lannister sitting on the beach with a three-year-old Jaime on her lap. She was kissing him and he was laughing, jolly as he was even then. There was no photo of Tywin. Tyrion, Jaime and Cersei claimed he was a tyrant, hence the distant relationship. Having met the Lannister patriarch herself, she could understand why his children thought so. 

The bedroom had clearly been fixed up by the housekeeper. It amused Jaime how Brienne was so stringent in keeping things neat and reddened at the condoms and empty packs the trash bin collected in the bathroom. “I don’t want her thinking we fuck all the time,” she hissed as he tried containing his laughter yet again this morning. She hunted for room pray as well to rid the room of the too-intimate scent of their fucking and ordered Jaime to go look around for any of her used underwear he’d hidden in the house. 

“I didn’t leave them anywhere she’d find, trust me,” he pointed out, grinning at her red, scowling face. “Gosh, look at you. So proper and mortified.” He suddenly leaned forward, his breath washing over her. Green eyes sparkled. “We both know that when I have my cock inside you that you could be a very filthy talker, Brienne.” 

“Shut up,” she hissed just before he kissed her. 

She shook herself away from the memory, not wanting to deal with a wet crotch yet again. She put the box at the foot of the bed where Jaime was sure to find it. A note was taped on top of it and she hoped he didn’t find it cheesy or ridiculous. Jaime was so smooth in handling their relationship while she was awkwardly fumbling and clueless. 

As she turned around to leave, the alarm beeped all over the penthouse. She frowned then reached under the bed for the baseball bat Jaime hid there. She stomped toward the front and saw the handsome devil himself entering the code. Quiet returned and Jaime turned, smiling upon seeing her.

“You’re really here.” His pleasure was sincere and Brienne blushed, looking at her shoes momentarily before gazing at him.

“Apparently you’ve instructed the concierge never to receive anything from me. That I’m to bring it myself,” Brienne answered as he walked toward her. A leather garment bag was draped over his arm. “What’s that?”

“Something nice to wear for tonight.” Jaime put a hand on her cheek and kissed her. Gods, his mouth should be illegal, she thought, swaying on her feet and dropping the bat. It landed right on Jaime’s foot and he hissed, pulling away to look at what happened. Red-cheeked, she stammered, “Sorry.”

He grinned and she lowered her head again, expecting to return to the kiss. To her surprise, Jaime just brushed his knuckles on her cheek and stepped away. He looked at her, garment bag still draped on his arm and looking fucking fine with his dark suit and smug expression. 

This was new. Usually he devoured her. _Always_ devoured her. Cheeks heating up, Brienne started to look around for her bags. She picked up the fallen bat and put it on the table. “Sorry again. Uh, I should go.” 

“Yeah,” Jaime looked unsure. Brienne found what she was looking for under the table with the winter roses. He cocked an eyebrow upon recognizing the logo of an expensive boutique. “Ah. It appears I’m not the only one who’ll be wearing something nice tonight.”

“You want it to be special. I don’t think my t-shirts would cut it.” Brienne shrugged, flushing to her ears. Though Jaime was just looking at her, she felt naked. She felt hot and cold, her nipples were tight and her cunt was beginning to ache. Fidgeting, she looked away. 

“I love you in t-shirts. But I love you best naked.” 

She let out a breathless laugh. “Stop it.” She was flat as a board with a boyish waist, broad but very unfeminine hips. Workouts gave her a lean body but with muscles that every athlete envied. Add her short hair and her height, she was often mistaken for a man. An ugly man. That eased her mirth and she looked at Jaime again. 

“So. . .I’ll see you at Blackfish?”

“That’s the plan.” Jaime’s voice sounded strained. 

Concerned now at his odd behavior, she asked, “Is everything okay? We don’t have to go tonight if you’re not feeling well.”

Jaime frowned, shrugged then sighed. “Brienne, I want to ask you something. Be honest, okay? I don’t want any miscommunication.”

He sounded pretty grave. Brienne’s spine stiffened. 

_He’s going to break up with me. That’s why he’s not kissing me. He’s going to take me out to dinner just to be nice._

It was something she was used to, she insisted to herself. Men were always leaving. But Jaime said he loved her and she saw the truth in his eyes. She knew what she saw but. . .what if it was only wishful thinking? Pain was a familiar emotion but the man standing before her was the one who would hurt most of all. Nevertheless, she looked at him right in the eye even her insides were going topsy-turvy. 

“Do you feel like. . I don’t know, do you have the impression that I’m only with you for sex?”

“Huh?”

“I love fucking you. It’s beyond Seven Heavens with you, if you want to know. But I know. . .we both know we fuck a lot. Really a lot. And I haven’t even taken you out for coffee. So do you think I’m only with you for sex?”

Even if you are I’d never push you away. You’re the only man who’s ever looked at me. “N-No.”

Jaime looked relieved. “Really?”

“I mean,” she chewed on her lip. “I know, yes. We. . .do it a lot. But. . .it’s not like I’m passive or did nothing to encourage it. I. . .I like it. I enjoy it.” The last sentence came out in a rush, as if she was embarrassed. And she was, for she had never spoke frankly about sex before. Not with anyone. 

Jaime stepped forward. “You don’t think. . .that. . .Brienne, you know that we’re not fuck buddies, right? I love you and respect you. Remember what I told you the first morning after?”

She blushed. “You—you told me a lot of things, Jaime.”

_I remember every word. You said that now you’ve gotten a taste of my cunt you can’t imagine being without it. You said you’ll tell me you love me. You will marry me._

As passionate as those declarations were, she dismissed them though her heart wanted to believe so much. But she was practical. Nobody fell in love as quickly—love at first was a myth, a fairy tale. She was not the type for someone to fall in love with as Jaime claimed to have done.

“Do you?” He asked softly, setting his garment bag down on the table and going to her. His hands settled on her waist. Brienne’s speeding breath was loud in the quiet of the room. With every ounce of courage she had, she looked at him. There was a knowing expression on his face but also a tenderness in his eyes. Something akin to hope. Or maybe it was her own reflected in his eyes.

“You said a lot of things,” she repeated, her panic making her voice come out rough and little high.

“I said I’ll marry you. That’s going to happen, Brienne. But I never asked how you felt about it.” Jaime said, brushing her hair away from her face. “I’ve not done anything for you that shows I love you and mean to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“You said you love me,” she whispered shakily as his fingers drifted down the tensed line of her neck. “How is that not. . .showing me your love?”

Jaime pulled her closer and nuzzled at her neck, breathing deeply. Pressed against him she felt every ridge and bulge of his body, including the one growing below his stomach. 

For the second time in less than ten minutes, Brienne dropped her things on the floor as Jaime kissed her. He winced as the tip of a box landed right on his toe but she was licking him back and clinging to his shoulders. As Brienne grabbed him by the shoulders, his hands skimmed down her hips, squeezing her buttocks. She gasped and yanked at his hair. He growled as his head was angled up sharply to receive her clumsy but sweet kiss.

Jaime was the air she breathed, the force that undid her, the stability in that settled her. He was lodestar, anchor, talisman. Brienne could hardly feel her legs and wondered if it was only Jaime keeping him and her both upright. He sucked on her neck as he ripped at the shirt she was wearing, buttons raining on the floor. As she started to protest that he shouldn’t ruin his own clothes, his head slipped lower and pulled her nipple in his hot mouth.

Brienne gasped, gripping him by the hair. “Jaime.”

“I shouldn’t touch you,” he groaned. “But I can’t. Not when you respond like this, Brienne. Gods, even a saint would get addicted.” He pushed her shirt down her shoulders and it fluttered down the floor. His lips wrapped around her other nipple while his fingers pinched and pulled at the red tip he had just vacated. She held him tight to her chest. "So fucking sweet. I can never resist you."

Brienne shook her head. “Please don’t stop.”

He looked up. The fire in his eyes was so hot it could brand her. _“Never.”_

“I love you,” she moaned as she attacked his lips with her own. In his arms, she was the bravest she knew. “I love you so much, Jaime.”

He pulled away a little to smile at her then, taking her by the hand, led her deeper inside the penthouse. Brienne stumbled after him, her vision clouded by lust with the occasional flashes of gold from his hair, the clear emeralds of his gaze, his brilliant white smile. Her need to be with Jaime was so unbearable she felt herself choking. Her arms wrapped around him from behind, kissing him frantically on the cheek, his nape, his jaw, his laugh encouraging more from her. He turned around, tried to, anyway, but in the tangle of their arms and legs, it was a task that sent them both to the floor. Brienne cried out and Jaime maneuvered so he was under her, his body taking the brunt of their fall. 

Horrified, she heaved herself up. “Jaime, I’m so sorry!—“

“Just shut up and kiss me to make me feel better,” he said, grabbing her by the nape and pulling her down. 

“But—“ she managed to gasp but he shoved his tongue in her mouth. Taking advantage of her shock, he rolled over so she was under him. She was trapped between the softness of the carpet and his hard body. It wasn’t a bad place to be. Not at all.  
Jaime cupped her cunt through the denim and she moaned, reddening at what he discovered. She looked away, embarrassed at how wet she was. Still rubbing her, he leaned down to lick her cheek.

“You wouldn’t be my Brienne if not for your wet cunt,” he whispered. “Were you thinking of me all day?”

She nodded, squeezing her eyes shut as she heard him lower the zipper of her pants. Then he gasped and she turned to look. Once again he was surprised then the expression transformed to one of appreciation. He beamed at her.

“No panties, eh? Good. You have a beautiful cunt, Brienne. It’s a shame you cover it.” He pulled at her pants, popping off her shoes then yanking the hot garment away. “Spread your legs, please.”

As embarrassed as she was, she couldn’t deny Jaime when he spoke to her like this, both commanding and polite. She opened her legs, biting her lip as she felt her honey slide down her cunt then toward the carpet. Jaime’s groan was possibly the dirtiest sound he’d ever made and she leaned up on her elbows to look at him. Jaime’s face was strained as if in pain as he struggled with the belt of his pants.

“Can I help?” She asked.

Jaime looked up and almost came. Her pale hair was a mess, her blue eyes drowsy and her mouth was a red, swollen wreck from too-rough kisses. She was naked and all freckles and sweat. Nipples red and pointing toward him, legs spread wantonly, her cunt and thighs wet and gleaming. He could only nod and Brienne bit her lip once again, trying to control another of her many blushes. Her purpose was to help, innocent, practical. So when she scooted towards Jaime and put a hand behind his thighs to get him closer, she missed the pained longing in his face. 

Brienne got on her knees so she was at eye-level with him. “Look at me, Brienne,” he said huskily. “Please,” the last word was a broken sound.

She obeyed, losing herself in the gold-tinged pools of his emeralds, her breath coming out in stutters as her shaking hands grappled with his belt. Even Jaime was trembling, hands curled into fists so tight the knuckles were white. Brienne was tempted to kiss him on the throat, to nuzzle the golden mat on his chest and push the tip of her tongue in his belly button. But he was so huge, she could hear the seams of his pants struggling. But the prospect of Jaime coming on her face was not. . .disgusting. Not at all. 

When she looked down to see to her task, he put a finger under her chin.

“Please keep looking at me.”

“I might hurt you,” she confessed. 

He smiled. “No, you won’t.” He seemed to debate with himself before touching her lips. “Fuck, they’re so soft. No, Brienne. You won’t hurt me. I trust you. Just keep looking at me.”

“Can I kiss you?” She asked desperately.

_“Please.”_

“Thank you,” she whispered, putting a hand behind his head and drawing him closer. As she crushed his lips under hers, her other hand acquired a sureness and grace never known before. The whirr of the zipper rose above their heated breathing. Warm flesh, steel cased in velvet, fell on her palm. Jaime growled against her tongue as he cupped her face in both hands. Their kisses sped up, each trying to outdo and also match the other’s passion. Spurned by a burst of confidence, Brienne ran her hand up and down Jaime’s cock, drinking his hisses and groans. When she gave it a hard squeeze, he ripped his mouth away from her.  
He glared at her. Brienne would have run away if not for the hunger in his eyes.

“Lie down.”

As soon as her back touched the carpet, Jaime was on her. His name from her lips just before they kissed, her arms and legs opening to receive him and hold him. Though their kiss had slowed down, their bodies still warred and writhed against each other. Her fingers gently tugged at his hair before skimming to the back of his shoulders, his hands flitted to her sides before his lips followed, sucking on the hard muscle of her right arm, a tongue flicking at her pouting nipple. His hair fanned the broad, flat plane of her stomach as his head lowered. She tensed, her legs bending, feet on tiptoes in anticipation of a hot kiss at her wet center. 

“You smell so good,” he marveled, pressing random kisses on her midsection, alternating with playful, small bites. She laughed as he tongued a very sensitive center on her side. “You have so many freckles.”

Her freckles had always been a curse but only Jaime loved them. She watched as he kissed down her left thigh, toward her leg. “So long,” he whispered, biting her muscled calf gently before kissing the arch of her foot. “Fuck, Brienne. I swear you dip yourself in vanilla all day to smell so fucking good. Tell me the truth.”

As he spoke, lips transferred to her right foot. Her toenails were crooked and in need of a pedicure but he kissed every toe reverently. He raised his eyes at her expectantly and it was a struggle remembering what he said. When she was like this, when with Jaime, he became the center of her world. The tilting point. 

“It’s just a shower.” She said, her mouth falling wide open as he licked the sensitive spot behind her right knee. “ _Oh, gods.”_

Jaime continued to nibble up the defined muscles of her thigh then licked the crease leading to her cunt. Then he pressed his nose right there, on her cunt. As Brienne wailed and tensed, he took a very loud, indulgent inhale. Heat slapped right into her middle and she clutched the threads of the carpet.

“I should have this bottled,” he murmured, rubbing his nose against her clit. “Fuck. _So fucking good._ You smell the best here. Fuck if this isn’t the best perfume in the world.”

Brienne, having formed a sentence in her mind to put a stop at his ridiculous statements, instead ended up crying out as he thumbed her open and suckled on her clit. The room went dark and as she struggled to see more of the light, Jaime sucked her harder. Her hips rolled, her legs pushed, but she didn’t want him off her, didn’t want him to go easy. It was just too much and he was going to kill her. Seeing her struggle, he cruelly removed his lips long enough to pant, “Play with your tits.”

“Huh? What?” 

“Your tits. Put your hands on them.” She was hesitant in removing her grip on the carpet but did as he said. Rubbing her palms free of the fibers, she put her palms on her breasts. The warmth of her hands on her sensitive nipples had her groaning. 

“Pinch your nipples. Just do what you like.” Jaime told her, lowering his face back to her cunt. “Give me something to watch, Brienne.” He added with a naughty grin she could never resist. 

He resumed destroying her in the most wonderful way. Nothing had been as good as his tongue circling her clit, his fingers fucking her. Nothing. This was pleasure unlike anything else but she doubted if the name suited this overwhelming feeling of fullness, of _everything._ Brienne would never forget so, despite lacking in confidence, she began playing with her breasts. Kneading and cupping the slight mounds as he had, pinching her nipples and gasping at the frisson of heat that stabbed her through this burning point and the other place where Jaime was lavishing so much love she couldn’t comprehend it completely. Try as she might to capture the feeling of his hands on her breasts, she could only come frustratingly close. But he was there, his tongue washing over her cunt, his fingers drawing more wetness from her. She was so wet that the spot under her hips was damp. 

Brienne risked a glance at Jaime. His eyes were big and hungrily watching her awkward touches, his lips and mouth unrelenting in assaulting her cunt. Looking at him looking at her made her dizzy with desire, yet gave her something to hold on to. As his green eyes flashed, challenging her, she pinched her nipples hard.

What followed was truly unlike anything before. There was no name for it, only a conglomeration of things that were like it but not even very close. It was like being tangled in livewires. Feeling as if the sun itself radiated from her. A violent, whirling storm sweeping her up. As Brienne squeezed her eyes shut from the otherworldly pleasure possessing her, her orgasm blasted Jaime right in the face. His eyes widened but without missing a beat, seized her hard thighs tightly and pushed his tongue deep in her cunt, fucking her. She groaned and fucked him right back, losing herself to the thousand and one sensations falling at her all at once. 

Then, one by one, the sensations receded. The thrusts of her body slowed down until she fell limp and wrung out on the carpet. Jaime licked her up and down, but slowly now. As she caught her breath, he crawled over her, his cheeks flushed, sweat dripping from the sides of his face. His lips and the area around his mouth were shiny with her juices. Normally it would make her so self-conscious at being all over his face like this. She was satisfied, but not yet as satisfied and sated as she knew only Jaime could do to her. He smirked as she pulled him up, her mouth already half-open for the thrust of his tongue. They groaned as they shared her taste, and groaned some more as his cock poked at the wet, sensual wreck that was her cunt.

“Are you. . .?” Jaime reluctantly pulled away from her kiss, chuckling softly as she frowned. “Can you still. . .?” He looked puzzled and it was so unlike him to struggle for words. Finally, with a sigh, he asked impatiently, “Can I still fuck you?”

Stunned at the question, she sputtered, “B-But---of course. Why? I mean, of course I want—“

He kissed her quickly on the mouth, licking her lips. “Good enough for me. If you’ll do the honors, my Brienne?” Then he held up the square foil of the condom. Though she was still weak and shaky, she managed to tear it cleanly. Jaime kissed her again then slid it on, wincing. He was so hard and big that the latex seemed to strain around his erection.

As he positioned himself between her legs, he gave her another smile. “Tell me, Brienne?”

“What?” She asked, not understanding his meaning. 

His smile was indulgent. “Tell me how you want me to fuck you.”

Blushing, she whispered, “Hard.”

“Louder.”

“Jaime, come on.”

He pointed at his ear. “I can’t hear you.”

Damn, he was the only man to both infuriate and drive her crazy with love. “Fuck me hard,” she said more firmly, loudly. Red blooming from her cheeks, she added, _“Jaime.”_

He grinned and spread himself over her, one hand guiding his cock inside her. She was wet and still dripping from her orgasm but she was still struggling to let him inside. Jaime sighed. His body was tensed and she knew he could come in an instant so she didn’t move. Instead she just lay back as he grabbed a pillow from the couch. 

“Put this under you. Under your shoulders. Are you sure you’re not too tired?”

Her eyes flashed defiantly. “Of course not!”

Brienne took the pillow and followed his instructions. Then Jaime pulled at her hips, moving her so the back of her thighs fully rested on his. When she realized that he meant to drape her legs over his shoulders, she froze. Jaime paused.

“Tell me.”

Her eyes were wild and big. “I’ve never. . .not in this position. Jaime, are you sure? I mean. . .I can turn around, it’s easier for you to enter me like that—“As she spoke, she was blushing. With Jaime, she was learning a lot of new positions. Positions she had only read about and scandalized her before. Being Jaime, however, opened up a sensual, curious streak in her. They still scandalized her but she couldn’t help herself. 

“Yes, I can fuck you from behind but that would deprive me of your beautiful eyes and the mirror is too far away.” As she blushed some more, he caressed her cheek. “My favorite thing about fucking you is how dark your eyes get, Brienne. I love seeing them. They’re sapphire storms.” 

With her legs up and high on his shoulders, the blood rushed to her head but she was quite comfortable with the pillow under her and her hips on his thighs. They gasped as he entered her easily this time, sliding inside her halfway before withdrawing then returning again, deeper this time. With every slide of his cock in and out of her, Brienne was slowly approaching that feeling of _everything_ again. 

Jaime grunted that she play with her breasts again, so she did. The pleasure was not only hers, she realized, for Jaime couldn’t take his eyes off her, eating up every inch of her, watching the twitches on her face and ever droplet of sweat that decorated her flesh. The new position opened up her cunt some more and allowed Jaime to fuck her way deeper than before. Gods, she didn’t know she could feel him so far deep inside her, and that he would feel like Seven Heavens. She couldn’t move as much except for what she was doing to her breasts but the sensation of Jaime inside her so deep was so _everything._

_Everything._

His hips rocked hard against hers, leading her to a fast, rough pace that had her crying out again. Through the haze of the second wave of her orgasm, she heard him telling her to touch herself. To play with her clit. She shook her head vehemently. She had never touched herself like that before. Had never touched herself until he asked her just a while ago. She thought she saw him smile at her stubbornness and she would have smiled back if not for his finger seeking her clit under the dirty-blond curls and playing with it. 

“Jaime,” she whined. Her clit was still sensitive and he was a little rough with it but no, she’d be insane to tell him to stop. Not when she was feeling so, so fucking good. _“Oh, gods, Jaime!”_ She sought his hand and buried her nails in his wrist. Jaime grunted in pain but continued thrusting inside her. 

A rough twist of her clit had her screaming, the sound echoing throughout the penthouse. As a flood of honey slid out of her cunt, Jaime cried out, expelling his release inside her a mere second later. She felt the warm jets of his semen despite the barrier between their flesh, her cunt eagerly squeezing every last drop from him. His back arched as he gasped, clutching at her legs draped on his shoulders before falling on top of her. Brienne grunted, not from the weight of his body but at his cock plunging another inch or more because they were still connected. Still, her arms went around him as Jaime collapsed on her with a sigh. She kissed his sweaty forehead and he turned to return the favor, but on her lips. 

With their still blood racing in their veins and their hearts pounding and more sweat drawn from the pores of their skins, it would be a while before they could catch their breath and be even slightly mobile. 

It didn't stop Jaime from talking, though breathlessly. As he made himself comfortable in her arms, he said, “Tyrion was fucking wrong to tell me to not fuck you. So fucking wrong, that imp. Not fuck you, indeed. Only an idiot would pass up your sweet, delicious cunt, Brienne, my love.”


	6. Save the Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut and fluff part two. :-)

Any man would pat himself on the back for sending his woman straight to dreamland after fucking. But Jaime was not just any man and the satiation he found with Brienne would only last a few minutes before he wanted her again. Usually she could go for another round or two before getting zonked. He hadn’t even taken her as hard as he normally did but had drawn out her pleasure, sending her to extreme highs and sort-of lows that when he pulled out of her, she was snoring and limp. He kissed her happily on the cheek, pulled her close and forced himself to sleep.

He was dreaming of freckles and sapphire eyes when something wet and light brushed on his chest. Slowly coming awake, he realized that chapped lips were kissing him, a mouth opening briefly to suck on his nipple before a tongue skimmed the narrow divide of his hard chest. A happy hum drifted from him as rough hair tickled his chest when those sweet lips transferred to his other nipple, a tongue circling it before sliding wetly down his stomach. His cock was quick to harden and thrust against a supple, firm shoulder and Brienne froze. He bit his lips to stop himself from smiling but fuck if she didn’t feel so good on him.   
In their one month together, he learned that Brienne took a lot of coaxing to initiate. A lot. Sometimes he pretended to remain asleep so she’ll have her way with him, easily imagining her red and hesitant but still determined to pleasure him as she nibbled on his hipbones. The first time he pretended to catch her, his cock was already stuffed halfway down her throat. Her blue eyes nearly popped out of their sockets and if not for the gentle push of his hand on her head, she would have stopped. How could she worry about him being disappointed in her, of thinking that he must miss the way he fucked other women? While many men fantasized about other women while their girlfriends sucked them off, Jaime didn’t. Perhaps it was a deliberate choice. Perhaps not. But when with Brienne, ever since their first morning together, no other woman crossed his thoughts. 

Rather he fantasized about the many things he would do to Brienne, and with her. Things he didn’t have the inclination to do with others.

He still kept his eyes closed but his throat was tight from controlling the groan that longed to tumble out. Right now Brienne sniffing him, taking a deep whiff as if his cock and balls were a fragrant bouquet of flowers. Her hand was calloused, and he imagined her fingers stained with ink that stain his cock too. Up and down she stroked him, then combined it with a twisting motion. There was no stopping his groan this time, his hips raising a little. He opened his eyes and, as expected, Brienne had frozen, her gorgeous eyes huge and her mouth hanging open.

He barely managed to raise his hand to touch her freckled, pink cheek. “Keep going.”

Was that a smile? There was definitely a gleam in her gaze as she resumed the task. It was a fucking turn-on that she was touching him the way he had taught her one wonderfully torturous afternoon, but mixed with her own style. His chest was tight as he watched her lift his cock a little to mouth his balls, sucking them. Then she licked the tender underside connecting them to his cock. Jaime cried out this time, feeling himself like a rocket about to blast off. He sweated bullets on his face, down his chest, his thighs.

“Brienne.” He raggedly whispered. “Fucking Seven, you’re killing me.”

His eyes were half-closed but again, he saw that familiar sparkle in her eyes, and yes, there was a definite smile though it was only a slight quirking of her lips. Then, deliberately teasing him, she opened her mouth wide and started licking his cock up and down, as if it were a rapidly melting popsicle on a summer day. He would tease her but the wet sounds of her licking were too loud and he couldn’t think of anything to say. Just when he felt himself knocking on the Stranger’s door, she opened her mouth again and devoured his cock.

Jaime’s fingers tore fibers off the carpet but his struggle was futile. As soon as the warm glove of her mouth wrapped around him, he was a goner. Blackness fell on him then quickly replaced by an explosion of light. His eyes opened, from his lips he chanted her name as he thrust madly toward her hungry mouth. His hips angled higher and Brienne made a gagging sound as his cock brushed the back of mouth but she didn’t retreat. Instead she adjusted her position and moaned. The last shred of control Jaime held on tore and he gave in, the blackness returning and flinging him deeper into the abyss before he tumbled back into the light. He groaned again, his hips slowing down before falling back on the carpet. Brienne sucked him again before releasing his cock with a loud, wet plop. Together, they sighed. His fingers lazily stroked her hair as she rested her head on his still-trembling thigh. She was shaking too.

He didn’t realize he had fallen asleep once again until he woke up alone. He frowned, a little annoyed that Brienne had left without waking him, or better yet, letting him fuck her. His crankiness was a little amusing, though, for he was so used now to waking up and finding her beside him. As he was hunting for his phone to jokingly berate her for taking her cunt away, he heard sounds from the kitchen. 

His cock was hard and red and angry like the Warrior. He stomped to the kitchen and sure enough, there was Brienne. Wearing the striped shirt he loaned her, wearing his boxers. She looked almost lovely in the warm light of the kitchen and his heart raced at how right she looked. In his clothes, with her red face, moving around his kitchen as if she belonged there. And didn’t she? More than that, she belonged right in his heart. 

“Brienne.” He said her name, half a groan, half a growl.

She was opening a bottle of red wine and looked up. Her darling blues and shy smile tugged at tender grin from him. “Hello, Jaime.” Then her eyes widened when she realized he was butt-naked, visibly swallowing at the sight of his massive erection. “Uh—“

He stormed toward her but she ran to him too. She grunted as their bodies slammed hard and gasped again when he shoved her none too gently against the door of the fridge. She glared at him and he cocked an eyebrow in challenge before fusing his lips to hers in a furious, branding kiss. He felt her push the boxers down and he helped, flinging the fucking garment away before raising her leg. His cock eagerly pressed toward her cunt but he suddenly stopped, startled at his discovery. 

“You’re fucking wet!” He roared, making her jump. _“How?”_

She worried her swollen lip and Jaime felt his balls tighten. Her vivid blush was enough of an answer and he chuckled, resting his head on her shoulder before looking up at her. “Thinking of me again?”

She nodded and he groaned. Your mouth destroys me, even without words. “Fuck, Brienne Tarth. _I fucking love you._ ” Then he was pushing his tongue in her mouth, his cock inside her tight heat. Her head fell back, baring the long, freckled line of her throat from which a beautiful sound slipped out.

“Jaime.”

There was no elegance to their joining. It was fucking at its crudest, most animalistic. It was all grunts and mewls, cock pounding mercilessly in cunt, both of them going up in flames. Brienne was so wet she came at his third thrust. Jaime howled in both protest and pleasure as her orgasm triggered his own. As the haze of their coming began to recede, they realized at the same time how limp their bodies were. Brienne shrieked as her legs collapsed, taking Jaime with her as she fell on the floor.

“Sorry,” he apologized, rolling off her. His spine couldn’t hold him up too and right now, he didn’t care how cold and hard the tiles were. Brienne, cuddled against him, stared at him curiously.

“What for?”

“That wasn’t my best.” 

She buried her head in his neck. Her whisper came in a rush, warm and tingling on his skin. “ _I_ liked it.”

He smiled and kissed her sweat-damp forehead. “How can I not love you?” He couldn’t resist kissing her around the face, lingering on the tip of her crooked nose. 

“See?” She said, looking up. He pushed her hair away from her face, just wanting her blue eyes bare. “I don’t need you to take me out on a date.”

“You may not, sweet girl,” he told her. “But I don’t want to scar our children for life by telling them that we just fucked and never went out.”

Brienne laughed and put her face on his shoulder. “Shut up.”

The children bit was a joke but it had Jaime wondering. Children. Someday. He could see himself teaching their children how to win at water balloon fights and Brienne frowning in disapproval. He hugged her closer. 

“But I thought I could do something about our dating situation,” she continued. “I was doing the final touches when you attacked me.”

Jaime grinned and wrapped his leg around her. “I don’t remember you complaining.”

“Never.”

Then she kissed him on the shoulder and sat up. “What the fuck, Brienne? I’m cuddling here,” he complained as she stood up. 

“Much as I appreciate your, uh, eagerness,” she said, blushing and looking around. “I would like my semi-hard work to be enjoyed. Er, Jaime, what did you do to the boxers? I can’t find them anywhere?”

Jaime got to his feet with a sigh. He grinned as his shirt swung as she turned, revealing the pink cheeks of her ass. He pinched her and she squealed, slapping his hand. 

“What do you need them for?” He teased, hugging her from behind. With a sly smile, he slid palmed her cunt and Brienne gasped, her head falling against his shoulder. Her curls were sticky and wet and as his fingers delved inside, she was a lot wetter and stickier. _Fuck._

“I think you should give up wearing underpants or anything below the waist, Brienne. It’s really cruel of you to deprive me of the sight of your beautiful cunt.”

“Jaime!” She managed to scold him. She was blushing furiously and turned around to glare at him, removing his fingers from her. “We just. . .did it!”

“We should always fuck.” He winked at her.

She shook her head and rolled her eyes. “You’re hopeless. Go put some pants on.”

“Ah. Fine.” Jaime kissed her before trotting back to the living room for his pants. When he returned, Brienne had his boxers back on and was lighting up candles. He paused by the doorway and grinned. Noticing him, Brienne blushed and removed the lids covering the food on the counter.

“Pancakes and bacon are better suited for morning but since it’s almost midnight, I figure they work too. And candlelight and wine makes this better than any date, in my book.” 

“You are simply the best,” Jaime declared, going to her to place a tender kiss on her lips. He then turned to look at the simple set-up on the table, a tall stack of pancakes, a plate of bacon, maple syrup. Brienne had also found some fancy-ass plates he didn’t know he owned. He smiled happily at her and pulled out a chair. “If my lady shall sit?”

“Gladly,” she responded, sitting down. Jaime put a napkin on her lap then sat down. She reached for his hand and he his toes curled. He smiled at her again.

“Jaime, I know you wanted us to go to Blackfish tonight. I really appreciate it but I also want you to know that a date doesn’t mean anything fancy. Yes, it is making a special effort for someone you love. I know that now. But I think it’s more of the intention and just. . . being with each other.” 

“That’s what counts, indeed.” Jaime agreed, kissing her hand. “That doesn’t mean we’re never going out for lobster in the near future.”

She grinned. “I look forward to it.”

Jaime glanced in the direction in the living room. “I will get you in that dress you bought somehow, Brienne. Come to think of it, I’ve never seen you in a dress.”

Brienne shook her head as she put pancakes on his plate. Jaime would rather he did it for her but he liked this too. “What do you mean? I wear skirts when we have dinner at Casterly Rock.”

“A skirt and a blouse. Not a dress.” He reached for the bottle of wine and took her goblet. As he poured her a glass, he noticed a gift box from a popular and expensive haberdashery. Brienne noticed the direction of his gaze and blushed yet again. 

“I, uh, got you a little something.” She said, taking the box. “It’s not to celebrate or anything. I just want you to know how wonderful you are. It’s a small token, that’s all.” Her voice was trembling. It was cute, really, and Jaime kissed her again, touched by her gesture.

“Can I open it now?”

“Please.”

Jaime took the box and sent her another smile. He undid the ribbon then popped open the box. “Oh, fuck,” he marveled, pulling out the artful roll of the silk necktie. He straightened it, nodding in appreciation. It the color of dark emerald and gold in a swirling, unusual pattern. It wasn’t his usual style—he preferred stripes, but he thought this one was exquisite. Even more so, it was from Brienne. 

Brienne took a sip of her wine. “I—I noticed you often wear stripes but when I saw this, I thought of you.”

Even better. He cupped her by the cheek again. “I love it.”

“Do you? Really?”

“Of course. I’d have worn this to our first date if I didn’t, hmm, what was your word? That’s it. Attack you.”

He could tell Brienne was moved by his words. “Only if you want to.”

“I’d wear this all the time, if I could. And being as this is the first date.” He winked and draped the necktie around his neck. With a few deft movements of his hands, the tie was looped and knotted. Brienne was laughing because he wasn’t wearing a shirt. Jaime truly loved her gift but it was more fun getting her to laugh and blush.

 

Some time later, an insistent hand on her shoulder shook Brienne awake. She growled, opening her eyes and whining as Jaime flicked on the bedside lamp. “What the hell are you doing?” She complained, turning away from the light and taking the blankets with her. 

Jaime kissed her on the shoulder. “I know this is a lot earlier than your usual waking hour, my love, but it is imperative that you wake up now.”

Brienne shook her head and huddled under the covers. “Jaime, I’m still tired. And sore.” They had fucked three more times after their midnight dinner. Hells, her thighs were still wet. 

As she tried to sleep again, Jaime crawled in next to her. His clothed body surprised her, and when the cold buckle of his belt pressed on her hip, she jumped and hissed. He laughed and kissed her on the shoulder again, then the nape. She moaned as he cupped her breasts before his hand lowered to palm her cunt through the boxers. 

“Please, my Brienne? I swear to you it will be worth it.”

She groaned again and turned in his arms. He smelled of cologne. “What time is it?”

“Five-thirty.”

She burrowed her face in his neck. “You _are_ cruel.”

He laughed and kissed her again. “Please, my love?”

Brienne was not a morning person. At all. The earlier she had to be up, the crankier she was. And when it meant vacating a very warm, comfortable bed, she was worse. Jaime being wide awake and dressed was not helping with her struggle. 

But when he kissed her and said all these endearments, she could never refuse.

So she let him pull her up. He brought her to the bathroom, where the light was already on. Brienne glared at woman in the mirror. Her hair was going to need a miracle to tame it and it would take an entire pot of coffee just to get approaching close to pleasant. Jaime kissing her on the cheek softened the stern expression on her face a little. Then he left, murmuring that he’ll get her things ready while she did her ablutions.

Brienne washed her face and brushed her teeth. She stumbled out of the bathroom and back towards the bed. Jaime was putting on a suit jacket to match his black pants. To her surprise, he was wearing the green-and-gold tie. He smiled and having washed her face now and a little steady on her feet, she smiled back.

“I really like the dress you got.” He gestured towards the foot of the bed. “Sexy shoes but I think you’d prefer more comfortable footwear?”

She raised her eyebrow at the sneakers he had placed at the foot of the bed. He kissed her on the lips again. “Save your stilettos for another date, my love. And believe me, you’ll wear them the whole night. I’ll wait for you outside.”

“Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise.”

“Jaime.”

“It’s a fucking date.” He sounded giddy. “Hurry.”

He closed the door behind him. Brienne sighed and stared at the dress for a moment before she shrugged out of her clothes.  
The dress she was wearing was a black, off-shoulder dress with a tight bodice and a fitted skirt. It fit her like a glove, outlining the muscles of her body. Her face and shoulders went red as she realized that because the dress clung so tightly, the line of anything she wore underneath would be obvious. She wasn’t wearing underwear anymore when she tried it on and hadn’t realized then this was one item she would have to forego. Brienne brushed her hair and put on Jaime’s sneakers. 

She looked weird but the pleasure on Jaime’s face when she presented herself to him told her otherwise. He looked handsome in his suit, his hair thick and just about to brush his shoulders, tha familiar smug and knowing expression on his face. He should look ridiculous pairing his suit with running shoes but didn’t. Gallantly, he offered his arm.

“Where are you taking me?” She pressed him again as they exited the elevator and headed for the lobby.

“I told you.” Jaime said coyly. “A date.”

“Are we going for a run that’s why we’re wearing these shoes?” She asked as the concierge greeted them. Jaime greeted them back and steered her towards a waiting Town Car. 

“Jaime, I’m going crazy!” She said as he urged her to enter the car. 

“Me too! I can’t wait!” Jaime said as he slid in beside her. To the chauffeur, he said, “Alright. Take us to the place.”

“Seriously? What’s with all the mystery?” Brienne demanded. 

“You’ll see.” He said, clearly enjoying her impatience and curiosity. 

Twenty minutes later, the car was pulling up across the street from Goldsun Park. Jaime took Brienne by the hand. It was still early in the morning but there were already a few cars on the road. He went slightly ahead of her, still holding her hand, while the other rose to halt and to signal at approaching cars. Brienne was smiling, her long legs easily keeping up with him. 

It was still a little dark although the sky had transformed from gray, where a few starks still flickered to that of indigo. Jaime led Brienne through the trees and she was grateful he had insisted on comfortable shoes. Those stilettos would survive running on concrete and would sink on the soft ground of Goldsun Park. Jaime was her eyes as he navigated through the cluster of trees. She could run easily but her tight dress restricted her movements. Once, she stumbled and he turned around to catch and break her fall. As her breath warmed his mouth, he suddenly grabbed her head and kissed her deeply on the mouth. Though out of breath, she kissed him back passionately. When he pressed her against a tree, she tried to raise her leg to pull him closer. Her growl of frustration alerted him to her failure and he grinned.

“I’m sorry. It’s this dress!” She complained, glaring at it.

“You’re fucking magnificent in it but I can see the problem. If you don’t mind my solution?” He asked.

She nodded. “Please.”

She should have known better what Jaime’s solution was. Her squawk only scared off birds and could never repair the ruin Jaime’s hands brought to her dress. As she got ready to lecture him, he gasped at his discovery.

“You’re not wearing underwear!”

She swatted him on the head. “We are not fucking in public!”

Jaime shook his head and she grinned devilishly. Then with a smoothness she wasn’t known for, she sidestepped his seeking, naughty mouth and ran. Jaime complained loudly but took off after her. 

She broke through the trees, coming to a skidding stop at the sight that greeted her. As she stared disbelievingly at the scenario before her, Jaime reached her. He saw her astonished expression and smirked.

Brienne put a hand on her heart. It was beating so fast she feared it would jump out of her chest. She looked at Jaime before being drawn back to the preparations underway by the sudden whoosh of air.

“I-I don’t understand.” She whispered, her eyes taking in the basket. Her mouth fell open at the huge balloon the color of rose and azure. It was scattered with white crescent moons and stars. “What—what are going to do, Jaime? I mean, this isn’t. . .are we going on a hot-air balloon ride?”

Jaime took her by the hand and steered her closer to the preparations of their ride.

“Why, of course. I could never seem to touch the ground when with you so why don’t I show you how it is?” He put his lips close to her ear and whispered. “You always take me to the moon and stars, my love. I think it’s selfish that only I know how it feels.”  
Brienne suddenly laughed and threw her arms around him. She surprised him with a deep, full kiss on the mouth. She looked adoringly in his beautiful emerald eyes. 

“I love you, Jaime Lannister.”


	7. Down Comes the Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The continuation of their date with lobster as the main course and heaping sides of awkward dirty talk and angst.

Jaime Lannister was often sure about a lot of things but this date with Brienne, the first ever, would have given him nightmares had he freaked out. He made dinner reservations at the Blackfish, still keeping in mind Tyrion’s advice about treating his love as a lady by not fucking her afterwards. That was all shot from the moment the concierge thought to tell him that Miss Tarth had just arrived at his apartment. He was so eager to see her that the security code to disable the alarm was all scrambled numbers in his brain before he focused on the calm gaze of her astonishing blues. That cleared his head, but only for a moment. When he saw her tentatively coming at him with a baseball bat, looking like a sapphire-eyed Warrior Maiden, his cock was demanding to be buried in her cunt. Gods knows he tried to control himself but it was moot. 

As she slept in his arms, having passed out after the third bout from sheer exhaustion, Jaime was wide awake and tensed. It was sweet of her to make his favorite breakfast and the gift, “A small gesture,” she had tried to downplay, was moving. Well, he was a fucking sap when it came to the six-foot-three goddess of his life. She had given him her heart, her trust, and what had he done for her? As big as his cock was, no matter how much it satisfied his lady love, well, it just didn’t make the cut. 

It was with great reluctance when he started moving away from her, careful to disentangle her heavy limbs from his body. Brienne made a needy, whimpering sound, throwing her arms around him and knocking him back on the mattress. She may be exhausted but her body certainly wanted more. But Jaime had calls to make, plans to see the fruition of. He placated her with a soft kiss on the lips, her neck, her cheek before she sighed and lay flat on her back, freeing him. Jaime took his phone and would have padded out quietly if not for stubbing his toe on the edge of the bed. It took every bit of macho-ness he had to bite down the howl of pain that would have ripped out of his throat. His eyes were a little watery as he hobbled out of the bedroom, going all the way out to the kitchen to make several urgent calls. 

Nobody dared yell at him for he was a Lannister. More importantly, he was Jaime Lannister. Perhaps not as terrifying as Tywin, definitely not as sharp as Tyrion nor as shrill as Cersei but he knew how to use the limited arsenal he had very well.  
Thank the gods it worked.

Brienne was wearing his suit jacket for it was very chilly up in the air. The wind kept whipping at her hair and she one hand holding it back while the other pointed at the sights below them with the glee of a child. “Oh, Jaime, look! Is that the Roseroad? I swear I can see all the way to Winterfell!”

He chuckled and put an arm around her waist. It was still a little too dark but hey, if Brienne said she could see all the way to that miserable city of eternal winter, why not. She was younger and had better visual acuity. “Just say the word and we’ll make our way there.”

She kissed him on the cheek and whispered, “Liar.”

They were in the air for close to an hour. They were quiet in watching the sun break rise from the horizon, flinging its light to all of Westeros. Jaime, who didn’t see himself as a romantic, was moved at the simplicity of what was happening. The sun would always rise but how many times did you get to greet it with the person you loved most in the world? Even better, this person loved him back. He slipped his fingers through the little arcs of Brienne’s left hand. She watched him kiss her fingertips, her lips parting open as he lingered on her ring finger. If she thought what he said a month ago, the morning after they first fucked, was just a carry-over from the high of sex, the kiss on that significant finger should tell her he meant it. So things were fast. Insanely fast. But never, absolutely never had Jaime felt anything like this for anyone before. 

Brienne was not the socialite Tywin wanted for him, she wasn’t delicate and would probably wish herself dead sitting on the board of numerous charities and spending her days organizing cocktails and events for him and the whoever mattered in King’s Landing. Instead she was six-foot-three and looked like a contender for the Westeros Mixed Martial Arts champion. She was happiest in the library reading up anything she could get her hands on about High Valyrian literature. Her eyes were a rare, astonishing sapphire blue. 

Brienne Tarth was the dream he never dared think about it, come to life. 

The operator of the balloon had them hold tight as they began their descent towards Goldsun Park. They must still be around two feet from the air when Brienne asked if she could jump. The operator glanced at Jaime, who just shrugged sheepishly. “Just be careful, miss,” she was told. Brienne snorted a laugh and leaped down, landing with the grace of a gazelle on the ground. Jaime followed.

As soon as he straightened up, Brienne threw her arms around him. “Wow! Jaime, that was so much fun! I can’t believe you did that!”

He laughed and held her tight. Her pleasure had been obvious from the start but it was helluva lot nice to be told so too. “You liked that, huh?” 

Brienne slapped him hard on the shoulders, making him yelp. She was totally skipping in his arms! It was so cute. “Liked?” She demanded as if it was atrocious that this was the only adjective he could manage. Her eyes were huge. “I _loved_! I fucking loved it!” This time, she hauled him to her chest, easily lifting him from the ground. 

Gods, she was so strong. No wonder she came close to killing him in bed! He laughed in her arms and laughed even more at the smiles they were getting from passersby and the operators of the hot air balloon company. Brienne’s enthusiasm was so charming and infectious. 

As she set him back on his feet, Jaime grinned at her. Her hair was a mess and there was a wild look in her eyes that at first glance she seemed crazed. Her cheeks were a really becoming pink and she was so fucking sexy in his jacket and her dress with the skirt ripped in the center and sneakers on her feet. She looked happy and relaxed and as the sun fell on her, Jaime forgot how to breathe for a few seconds. Her face coming close, then her full, plump lips brushing his was the fucking kiss of life, bringing a swoosh of oxygen in him. He gasped and held her head, deepening the kiss and pouring into it all that he felt for at this very moment. 

_Only a month but it seems I’ve always loved her._ He thought, resting his forehead against her and enjoying the slight tremors in her body. _It’s like I have loved her even before I knew about her._

“Thank you, Jaime,” she whispered.

He shook his head. “Thank you, Brienne.”

Then he put another kiss on her left hand and steered her away from the balloon. They walked but Brienne’s steps began to falter. “Wait,” she said, tugging at his hand. “Jaime, we have a problem.”

“What is it?”

Blushing, she pointed at her skirt. The rip was higher now and dangerously close to her cunt. Remembering she was naked under it, Jaime fought back a smile. His cock was twitching in anticipation as much as he’d like to take her now, he could be a gentleman. 

“I’m sorry about this, Brienne,” he said, meaning it. “I’ll replace the dress. But right now, I need you to take off the jacket. I have an idea.”

Brienne slid it off. “You don’t have to do that, Jaime. It’s not like I’ll be wearing this again.”

“Why not?” He asked, taking the jacket. He wrapped it around her waist, tying the ends of the sleeves at her back. “You look lovely in it. Really shows off your freckles.” As she flushed at his compliment, he stepped back to inspect his work. It wasn’t perfect. She looked a little ridiculous but sweet. Brienne, clearly getting self-conscious, stammered, “Maybe I should go to my apartment and change.”

“Nonsense. You look fine. Besides, our date’s not over.” He looked at his watch. It was quarter to seven. He didn’t have work until nine and he knew Brienne’s class was at that time too. 

“Not over?” She asked as they resumed walking. “What else have you got up your sleeve, Jaime?”

“I’m guilty of often forgetting to feed you,” he said, making her laugh. “So I thought we could have breakfast.”

“Ooh. Hot Pie?”

“Something a little better than our usual. This is a date, if I may remind you.”

“Whatever you have planned, I’m sure I’ll love it, Jaime. It’s so wonderful of you to make all these preparations.”

“One of the few times being a Lannister has advantages,” he said, shrugging. 

The Town Car was still waiting for them on the other side of the street. Once again, they jaywalked, Jaime holding up his hand to stop the vehicles coming for them and Brienne clasping the other. When he gave yet another mysterious instruction, “On to the next, please,” Brienne let out a frustrated sigh. 

He patted her on the knee. “Don’t worry. You’ll like this one. How are you feeling?”

Brienne’s answer was swift. “Happy but the suspense is killing me!”

He laughed and kissed her on the cheek. “I promise you’ll like what’s next.”

The drive was only fifteen minutes. Jaime peered out of the window as the driver walked around to open the door. He was the first to step out, looking up at the sleek, black and silver structure of the building with satisfaction before turning around to help Brienne out of the car. Her pale eyebrows were practically meeting in the middle of her forehead as she looked around. She tilted her head as she looked at the bold, black B engraved on the door.

“Where are we?”

Jaime tucked her hand around his elbow. “Blackfish.”

She looked confused. “I didn’t know it opens this early.”

“They’re only open for lunch then they close at three before opening for dinner,” Jaime replied as the door opened and an elegant man with a shock of white hair stepped out. He was wearing a sleek, black tailcoat with perfectly pressed pants and a shirt so white it was blinding. Jaime kissed Brienne when she glanced down at her makeshift cover-up. 

Compliments about her looks wouldn’t do anything for her but he knew the exact words that told her everything was alright.  
“I love you, Brienne.”

She turned to him and nodded, blushing beautifully. Jaime kissed her on the cheek and together, approached the elderly gentleman.

“Good morning, Mr. Lannister and Miss Tarth. Welcome to Blackfish. We are honored to have you here with us today.”

“We’re glad to be here too, Davos,” Jaime responded as the door was opened to them. “Thank you for accommodating my very ill-timed request.”

“No request is ever ill-timed, sir,” Davos said as he followed them inside the restaurant. “Requests are never too early nor too late, only that they must be executed when needed. If you will follow me, please.”

Jaime basked in the pleasure of the awed expression on Brienne’s face. The interiors of Blackfish were done in black and white with a splash of very soft gray. The floors were shiny marble tiles, the walls dark, rich mahogany. Soft violin music could be heard. Jaime had to restrain himself from telling Brienne to pay special attention to what was being played. He didn’t have to wait long. As they followed Davos, Brienne gasped and whispered to Jaime, “Is that ‘It Is Known’ from Drogon?” Drogon was a famous rock band and their favorite. Brienne’s favorite Drogon song was the surprising ballad ‘It Is Known.’

“I tried to get the band,” Jaime whispered back, jokingly. “But they weren’t available.”

“Oh, you!” She giggled.

Davos paused in front of black curtains and turned to them. “Mr. Lannister, Miss Tarth, your Blackfish experience awaits.” Then he swept the heavy curtains aside. 

Brienne’s expression was priceless. Only one table was set up, the area bathed in soft, golden amber light. A lone violinist was playing a tender rendition of ‘It Is Known.’ 

“Davos, I’ll take it from here, if you don’t mind.” Jaime told him “I trust you’ll take care of the rest?”

“Of course, Mr. Lannister. Once again, we are honored to have you.”

Jaime smiled at Brienne, who was still looking around with her big eyes and her mouth nearly hitting the floor. He gently guided her towards the table, pulling out a chair for her and spreading a napkin on her lap. He sat down and did the same for himself.  
As soon as he was seated down, a small team of waiters appeared. Champagne was presented for his approval before it was poured into the glass. Plates appeared, piled generously with lobster Thermidor. With quiet pride, the server announced that the lobsters for the dish came from the waters of Tarth. Brienne’s eyes sparkled and she beamed at Jaime. 

“I heard that the lobsters from Tarth are the most succulent and the sweetest,” he said, linking his hand through hers as the waiters, as suddenly as they appeared, vanished. “Just like the lady sitting in front of me right now.”

“All my life I’ve waited for a man such as you to compare me to a lobster,” Brienne retorted. But she wasn’t insulted. In fact, she appeared to be basking in it. 

“My love, if you are a lobster in human form right now, it has to be known that you are the sexiest crustacean I’ve ever seen. Your endless legs suggest that you must have an impressive set of claws. Or something,” he said as Brienne threw her head back with a laugh. 

Her laugh was not a lilting, silvery, flirtatious sound. It was loud, and a combination of a bark and something like neighing. But damn, it was a fucking sexy sound. His cock certainly thought so. 

It may only be a single course meal with lots of champagne but they made it count. Jaime worried about not knowing how to be on a date with Brienne. It turned out he had just worried over nothing. They were in fancy clothes, eating expensive food and sipping expensive champagne. Jaime’s financial manager would hyperventilate once he found out just how much he promised the manager and staff of Blackfish to get them to open way before operating hours and to serve rare lobsters from Tarth. Add that hot-air balloon ride and this was hands down one of the most extravagant first dates in history.

But all preparations would be for nothing if your companion wasn’t someone you were comfortable with. Jaime was relaxed with Brienne. With other women, he felt compelled to be the kind of Lannister everyone expected of him. Arrogant, smug, devil-may-care. Brienne would tell him he was still all of that but there was a glaring difference.

Not only was he relaxed with Brienne. He absolutely loved being with her.

They didn’t have much in common. Sure, they have similar inclinations and also backgrounds, to an extent. He was in the business of words, coming up with witty slogans and taglines while she was into High Valyrian literature. Their families could trace their lineage all the way to Aegon’s Conquest of Westeros. Tarths were only a minor house while Lannisters were one of the seven great houses. They had unavailable fathers and lost their mothers while still young—in Brienne’s case, too young. But that was it. 

He was sure and she apprehensive. She was awkward and he was smooth. He didn’t have any filter system and spoke exactly what he thought. She weighed her words and turned them over and over in her head, going through a lot of permutations before she stammered. Men envied and wanted to be like him. Women fantasized about him. Women pitied her. Men dismissed her and called her the ugliest woman they’ve ever seen. 

He appeared to be someone who gave little thought to what others may think of him but the exact opposite was the truth. She worried about how she came across but having received little kindness her whole life, she didn’t care if people thought her ridiculous. She would do as expected and if people couldn’t get past her ugly face, that was their problem.

They were practically on opposite side of the spectrum but somehow came together to be the sum of them, a result only possible with them and no one else.

It was terrifying. 

They talked for a long time so it was surprising that they had gone through the good by seven-thirty as well as the champagne. It was still too early and Jaime was loathed to part from Brienne. He told himself it was because he couldn’t let her go. This was true. But it was also true that he wanted to hold on to her for as long as he still could. For there was something of him that she must know. A part of him that would always mark him and still made him hate himself sometimes. 

But instead of telling her, he suggested they go back to his apartment.

Brienne blushed and nodded. All it took was a quick, shared look to know what was next.

Jaime waited until they were in the bedroom before letting himself kiss her once, twice, then many, many more times. Brienne tasted of champagne and the sea. The parts of her skin bared by the dress were cool while those covered seemed touched by the sun. He breathed her name just before diving for her cunt. 

As he had hoped, she was wet, so wet and probably wetter than the sea. Her eyes were guileless, soft, beautiful sapphires that both calmed and spurned him on but this, the most secret scent and taste of her, this was the very heart of Brienne Tarth. She tasted of heady, womanly spice, the honey pouring out of her copious and the promise of Seven Heavens. To be with Brienne, like this, was to be surrounded by purity and goodness. For several beautiful minutes, he convinced himself that he was worthy of her, feeling that she had absolved him and rewritten his entire history. Removing the chapter that damned him and would always be the sword hanging over his head.

“Jaime, please. Come here,” she begged him in a voice that would always shake him and make him do whatever she asked.  
Though he couldn’t wait to kiss her soft lips, he took his time. He laid kisses on her thighs and stomach, cupped her small breasts and feasted on fat nipples still tender and swollen from his suckling early this morning. As she sobbed and pleaded with him again, punctuated with a please, he mouthed the entire mound of her breast. Her leg wrapped around his hip as she arched, pushing her breast deeper into his mouth. 

He didn’t have time to enjoy the sight of her nipples red and wet with his saliva. She pulled him up, giving him the sweet gift that was her mouth and he took it. He took it because she was giving it to him and for this moment, he felt that he deserved it. 

As their tongues tangled and sparred, he held her close and shifted, moving to lay on his back and putting her on top of him. She grunted against his tongue in surprise and tried to pull back but he stopped her. Reluctantly, he put a pause to their heated kiss to look at her.

There was fear in her eyes, her chin wobbling and her body, so soft and pliant mere moments ago, now stiff and clinging to him. She was very conscious of her superior size and weight. She had only been on top twice and she admitted being uncomfortable, feeling so huge and worried about hurting him. Jaime didn’t push it but right now, right now he needed her powerful. He needed her to take him this way. If she could see how strong he was, how much he loved her, then maybe, just maybe, when she found out the truth about him, she would stay. 

Because that was it, wasn’t it? The reason he couldn’t take her out. The real one. Because once they went out on a date, she will have to know about Jaime Lannister. The traitor. The man who betrayed his mentor, Aerys Targaryen. It was hard to let go of the bliss of being with Brienne because he could forget, he could fool himself into believing he was a good man. 

“Jaime, wait—“

 _“Please.”_ He buried his fingers in her hair and looked in her eyes. “I want to see you like this. I need you to take me like this.”

She shook her head, panicking. “I’m so big—“

He managed to smirk. “So am I.”

“I’ll hurt you.”

“No. You won’t.” 

“Jaime, I’m not sure.”

“I am.” He licked her lips and asked, “Do you trust me?”

She nodded.

His balls tightened painfully just thinking of the words he said next: “Then get on top of me.”

He watched Brienne gather herself, shutting her eyes briefly before opening them and giving another nod. Then with a visible gulp, she swung one leg over so she was straddling his hips.

Gods, she was heavy. And fuck, she couldn’t feel any more perfect even if she tried. Brienne shifted, still concerned about crushing him. Her small breasts swung and jiggled with every motion of her body and her cunt slid wetly against his cock. It took every ounce of what little willpower Jaime had to still her, putting his hands on her thighs.

“If you’re going to move like that,” he said through gritted teeth, “take my cock inside you first. Drawer.”

“Oh!” Her eyes widened, as if remembering just now what she had to do. The _crucial_ thing she had to do. Jaime endured several more seconds of torture as she moved to open the drawer and pull out the long strip of condoms there. As she neatly tore one square packet from the rest, she asked, very innocently, “Jaime, is there something you want me to do in the meantime? I mean, aside from this?” She blushed. “I ask because. . .”

He grinned. “I’m getting harder?”

She nodded.

“Why don’t you talk?”

“Talk?”

“Like now.”

“Oh.” Brienne tore the packet open and pulled out the familiar ring of the condom. “You mean,” she flushed from forehead to her breasts. “Talk dirty?”

Well, what do you know. If she left him, Jaime would always have this memory of her. On top of him and looking glorious, as if she belonged there, and talking dirty. Not that he minded when she ordered him to fuck her hard, sometimes. 

“Sure.”

Brienne opened her mouth then closed it.

Jaime swore he was going to die. “B-Brienne.”

“Oh, Jaime, I don’t know how.” She looked embarrassed.

As she spoke, she was moving again. Jaime clamped his teeth on his lip as she took his cock and carefully, torturously put the condom on him.

“It’s okay. Just tell me what you’re doing.”

“Huh? Um. Okay. I just put the condom on you.”

“Details.”

Brienne blushed as she threw her leg over his hips again. “I put a magnum-sized condom on you.”

Jaime would laugh if his cock wasn’t in the deepest pit of the Seventh Hell. _How could she demand me to fuck her then be so clueless with talking dirty? Brienne, gods. You must love me, please. Love this flawed man who doesn’t deserve you at all._

As she guided his cock inside her, he tried again. It was a miracle he managed to form a coherent sentence because her warmth seared through the latex. “Tell me about your cunt. What are you going to do with it— _ah._ ”

Finally. The first of Seven Heavens.

He closed his eyes and breathed harshly as her hips started pumping. Their flesh slapped gently together.

“I’m thinking of getting an IUD.”

_“Huh?”_

Putting her hands on his chest to steady herself, her hips began to move faster. “It’s this wire thing—“

“I know, I know.” This was the worst dirty talk ever but his cock was getting impossibly and painfully harder. And bigger. The condom felt too tight and she was getting tighter. 

Adorably clueless, Brienne, rolling her hips now and alternating with rapid, pumping motions, continued, “I thought about the Pill but it’s something I have to pay attention to but the IUD is like once it’s in, then I don’t have to worry about it. We can just . . .do it and go.”

_Seven Hells, was he getting turned on with her talking about contraceptives?_

“How—how do _you_ feel?” He gasped, gripping her wrists as she pinned him down. “Tell me about your cunt, Brienne.”

“I want more.” Brienne spread her legs wider and they both cried out as he plunged another inch. “Oh, yes, Jaime. Yes. Gods.” Suddenly, she asked, “Am I doing okay?”

Jaime groaned. “You’re going to kill me.”

She smiled. “Good.”

“Don’t go easy,” he gasped as she started fucking herself aggressively on his cock. Bloody Seven, he’d never been this deep inside her before. “But do what you like.” At her puzzled expression, he grunted, “Practice makes perfect.”

He had just finished saying the words when Brienne gasped. Her nails scratched at his chest and he growled, feeling her cunt squeezing him as it to really kill him. He grabbed her hands, nearly knocking her off balance but he pulled her down to him. Still holding her hands, he pulled them with his so they were over his head. Her legs spread wider. Plastered against him like this, the hairs on his chest scraped her breasts. She moaned.

_“Jaime.”_

“Keep your hands like this.” He growled, letting go. Then he grabbed her by ass, held her still then pounded up inside her.  
Brienne sobbed, chanting his name as his cock pushed hard and deeper inside her. His hands had stilled her only for a moment before she was moving again, totally ignoring the pace he wanted her to adopt. He didn’t mind. She looked so surprised and pleased by what was happening to her, what his cock was doing that this act of rebellion was most welcome. Obedience was boring. Defiance, now that was always a turn-on. 

“Oh, gods. Jaime,” she sobbed against his neck. _“Jaime. Jaime.”_

He grabbed her by the nape and drowned in her eyes. It was Brienne who pressed her fingers on his jaw and kissed him with the sweet hesitation of the Maiden. It was barely a kiss but Jaime’s control snapped. He hissed her name and pushed his tongue in her mouth just as his cock fountained up inside her. She tore her mouth from his, crying out and tightening around him as if to stop him. She wasn’t there yet. No problem.

Jaime pulled her back for another kiss while his other hand slipped between their heaving bodies. As his fingers brushed the damp curls of her cunt, he heard the sharp, ripping sound of fabric and knew the sheets would have to changed. Brienne whined when his fingers found her and one hand gripped his shoulder hard enough to leave bruises. He was still coming and she still some ways to go. 

Suddenly, she sat up, fire in her eyes. Her hips still moving fast while his were beginning to slow down. He hated not having made her come first but the slightest, that almost-kiss undid him. She suddenly picked up her hands to bring them to her breasts. As he continued rotating his fingers on her clit, he smiled. She was remembering what he’d asked her to do last night. The familiar warmth and slide of her honey dragged a strangle sound from him.

Jaime’s cock was spent and half-hard by the time Brienne moaned her release. Nevertheless, it was wonderful feeling her tighten around him, coaxing his cock to some more hardness but not hard enough. She was pink and sweating profusely afterwards, dropping heavily next to him in bed. Jaime turned on his side, facing her. She was panting and her breath was warm, still smelling of champagne. 

They didn’t have much time left. They had just a little over half an hour to remain like this. Or just thirty-six minutes is all I will have of her, he thought, feeling himself go cold. Brienne had been in his life for only a month, a month! Such a short period of time but being with her made Jaime feel as if he was walking in the light again. That he was good. Untarnished. A bit more deserving of the gift that was Brienne Tarth.

Jaime would never think himself transparent but when he turned his attention back to Brienne, her eyes were clear and in them was a question. He kissed her, suddenly not sure if this was the time, if he should even tell her. It had been years, he reasoned. The specter of his betrayal would have to leave him someday. 

But.

Before Brienne could ask or say anything, he said abruptly, “You’re going to be late for class. Let me call you a cab.”

He swung his legs off the bed and stood naked. He heard Brienne getting up as he put his boxers on. He turned and saw her sitting up, clutching the sheets to her chest. 

“Oh. You’re. . .I mean, I don’t expect you to, but I guess you have a meeting, huh?”

“Yes. A meeting. Is that alright?” 

“Of course.”

He cleared his throat and was suddenly thankful of Tyrion’s advice yesterday.

“Brienne, there’s something you should know. Tyrion. . .look, I don’t want to stop seeing you. That’s not going to happen.” He said this with more force than necessary. “But our relationship has put Tyrion in a delicate position.”

Brienne was quicker to catch on than expected. “He wants us to be more discreet.”

He went to her, dropping on one knee to kiss her hungrily on the mouth. “I would like to drop you off to school myself. Believe me.” He was practically pleading with her. “But I don’t want to put Tyrion’s job at risk.”

Her smile was understanding and she kissed him back. “Jaime, I understand. Really, it’s nothing.” He shuffled away to continue dressing. Brienne remained in bed, still looking sweet and bedraggled with her hair a messy pile on her head, her eyes bright and drowsy and her mouth swollen like a rosebud ready to bloom—the embodiment of all reasons why he was stupid to leave and fuck truth. He would lose her if he told.

“Are you okay, though?”

He flushed as he stepped into his pants. “I’ll make it up to you, my love.”

She reddened. “That’s not—“

Pretending to misunderstand, he drawled, “Are you busy tonight?”

“I have a paper to finish. It’s due early next week.”

“Would you. . .would you like to bring your work here? Or I can stay with you.”

Brienne’s eyes widened and she said quickly, “No! It’s okay. I’ll bring my books and laptop here. It’s not a problem.”

“Okay.” He wanted to tell her he’d like to see her place but it was probably too soon. Brienne’s wet cunt meant that foreplay was highly unnecessary with them but she was the kind of fire that had to be coaxed gently and patiently before lighting up completely. He decided not to mention being invited to her pad for now. 

“That’s good,” he added with a smirk. “That means you get to come back here and I can make up to you that very deplorable fucking.”

“It wasn’t like that. What I want to ask is—“

Jaime interrupted her again. “Allow me to make it up to you, Brienne. I’d like to worship your big, sexy body. But only after you’ve written your paper, of course.”

Brienne sighed, seemingly having given up the interrogation she wanted to lead him to. She held the blankets as she stood up.

“Shall I call you a cab?” He asked, putting on the shirt, sliding the green-and-gold necktie around his neck. Brienne smiled seeing him wear it again. 

“Maybe you should let me get dressed first,” she suggested. “The contents of your closet would be most helpful?”

Jaime’s smile was pure relief. _She will come back. And I’ll tell her then. If she loves me. . .I hope she loves me, she’ll understand. She’ll stay._

“Help yourself,” he said. _Take everything you need. My heart is yours._

_It's not much but all I have._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jaime's business with Aerys, mentioned throughout this series, has not really been discussed. We know what happened and I think, I've mentioned as an answer to a question before, there's sufficient information scattered in the stories to know what went down. 
> 
> But how Brienne finds out has not really been discussed nor shown, I think. That's coming up in the next chapter.


	8. Delaying Tactics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brienne gets some encouragement but still has questions.

The graduate seminar on Westerosi Literature from the Dragon Resurgence to Early Modern Period under Howland Reed was Brienne’s only class for the day. She was enrolled in four classes this semester, along with the occasional responsibilities as a graduate assistant that required her to be at the department for a few hours and a personal, thriving romantic relationship. The academic requirements were challenging enough already but Brienne had never been afraid of hard work, nor in having to put in extra.

She had the cab drop her off at her apartment, needing to be in her own clothes after a couple of days of being in Jaime’s. She didn’t change the shirt he loaned her but his jeans were on the baggy side and long in the crotch, of course. And his boxers got all scrunched which was uncomfortable. She replaced these with her own, slimmer pair of pants, fresh panties and switched his sneakers for her tan, tasseled loafers. Feeling more like herself, she got on her bike and pedaled the short distance to school.  
She parked her bike in an assigned rack by Baelor Hall, where her class with Howland Reed was held. Her movements were careful as she swung off the bike, a grimace on her face at the discomfort. She was still tired and a little sore from last night’s activities. This morning’s tumble in the sheets was not rough but it was what bothered her. Deciding what exactly about it made her concerned would take some thinking and right now, she had to focus on class. She swung her backpack up her shoulder and jogged up the steps of the building.

After class, Howland Reed called her over. He was a short man with a pleasant face and dark green eyes the color of moss. He complimented her on the latest essay she had turned in and wanted to ask if she was thinking of getting it published.

Brienne was flabbergasted. “You mean like, in a journal?” 

“Precisely, Miss Tarth,” Howland said with a friendly smile. He took his briefcase. “Walk out with me, will you? So, have you tried submitting any of your work to journals before?”

She pinked, flustered by this unexpected compliment. She shook her head and he shook his head at her, still smiling but now a little reproachful.

“You should think about it. You have a highly original mind and your work is always solid and I’ll even add thoughtful. That’s not something you’ll usually say about boring academic articles. And yours isn’t.” 

“I will, Professor. Thanks.”

“Do you have a thesis adviser already? I believe you’re almost done with your coursework.”

“Not yet.” Brienne was hoping to land Catelyn Stark for this, thus why she was trying to get on the professor’s good side. She was the foremost expert on literature and languages of Essos, with a strong focus on High Valyrian literature. “And yes, I still have the foreign language requirement to hurdle before I can begin my thesis.”

“Well, when the time comes, I hope you’ll remember me. I would be honored to help direct your thesis.” Howland doffed his hat. “I’ll see you, Brienne.”

“Yeah,” was all Brienne could say. Blushing upon realizing she was being rude, she hurriedly said, “I will, Professor Reed. That’s really generous of you. And thank you for your encouragement. Really.”

Howland waved goodbye and she shyly waved back. 

Brienne was still staring off into space, bamboozled by the quiet professor’s words. It was unbelievable. Howland Reed was still one of the foremost and formidable experts and researchers in the field despite his age. Unlike most professors who had a certain arrogance and aura of impenetrability, he was quiet. Thus, when he was unusually profuse or said things outside of a lecture hall, they were as precious as gold. Brienne clung to them. She was fully aware that she was an excellent student and hoped to contribute to the field someday but never in her wildest dreams did she think that such prodding would be from someone as esteemed as Howland Reed.

After that shit year with Hyle and Renly having to abruptly leave the program, things were looking up. She had Jaime. And now, this. She took a step forward and nearly fell down the stairs due to a slight misstep. People glared at her, somebody yelled, “Watch it!” Her cheeks crossed to red but she didn’t really care right now. Hugging her books to her chest, she hurried to the library.

It was a beautiful fall afternoon. The leaves were deep crimson and rich gold. Though many faces she came across were harried and some characters smelled a little funky on account of having worn the same shirt for three days straight, there was still a general atmosphere of leisure. Couples held hands either under the trees or strolled under the sun with eyes only for each other. She passed by a group arguing about traditional poetry versus free verse. 

Brienne went to the library. Even in the solemn silence and some students looking a bit crazed as they crammed for a paper or just studying, there was still that sense of leisure. She put some of her books at the drop then went straight to Jon’s carrel, tapping the door softly before opening it. 

Jon looked up from the pile of books and notebooks. His laptop was open and he was jotting down notes on a tablet notebook. He looked disgruntled but his face cleared upon seeing her.

“Hey,” she said in a normal voice. “Did you forget our lunch?”

“Of course not. I trust the date went great?” He said, looking away to write something on the notebook again. “Are you going to bore my ears with details?”

“It depends on what details you like. I think the bit about the hot-air balloon ride and lobster breakfast at Blackfish would knock you out. But the details before and after would probably be more to your liking but,” she paused dramatically to add in a stage whisper, “A lady never tells. Now, come on.” She was back to her normal speaking voice. “I’m starving.”

Jon smiled and stood up to pack up his laptop. “So it was great?”

“Awesome.”

He chuckled and zipped up the bag. “Awesome? What are you, twelve?”

“Fuck you,” she said, grinning. “I also have good news.”

“Jaime is out of town?”

“What? No. And why would that be good news? No, this is mine.” Brienne tapped her foot impatiently as Jon took his time. “Gods damn it, Snow, I’m ageing here.”

He smiled at her again and finished. They stepped out of the carrel, Jon locking up the room. 

They decided to treat themselves to lunch at The Spicy Pouch. Brienne had been full from the lobster-and-champagne breakfast but fucking Jaime afterward burned off the calories. She ordered the restaurant’s famous roast beef sandwich, a side order of salad and a glass of pink lemonade. Jon went for the boar burger, curly fries and iced tea.

Their food arrived quickly—they just about beat the descent of the lunch crowd by mere minutes. In between bites of their sandwiches, Brienne told Jon about Howland Reed’s recommendation and offer. He raised his hand and high-fived her, clearly impressed.

“You should consider him aside from Catelyn Stark,” he told her. “Both are sought-after and they don’t always take on a lot of students, if you catch my meaning.” Brienne nodded. Both professors were known for their high standards. There was also a rumor that if a student had yet to be published once in an academic journal, Catelyn Stark passed on the request to be an adviser. Howland Reed was more lenient with this.

“Howland’s your adviser, right?” Brienne asked. Jon was ahead of her by a semester although they shared a lot of classes. “How is he?”

“He’s more into general literature but he’s given a lot of really helpful feedback for my proposed study regarding stories of the Night’s King.” Jon said. “I’m not worried about him, to tell you the truth. It’s the critic he recommended for me. I have the right to pass on him but he’s like, he knows my study better than the back of his own hand.”

“Who is it?”

Jon made a face. “Alliser Thorne.”

“Oh, man. Does Reed want you to get fucked in the ass or something?” Brienne dropped her voice because the restaurant had some students and faculty members as customers at the moment. She shook her head.

She’d had one class under Alliser Thorne and it had not been good. She understood stern and demanding professors. Thorne was a sadist. He took pleasure in making students cry and gave no heed that students had other requirements in other classes. The workload was Seven Hells and he was as stingy with grades as he was generous with insults. He once wrote on Renly’s paper that his study was “whimsical shit for people who don’t read.” He thought Brienne’s papers were “virginal musings.” Jon, now Alliser Thorne thought he was a hoodlum. He accused Jon outright of perpetuating lies about his background to be prioritized for a scholarship. Jon filed an official complaint to the school and Thorne was reprimanded. Thorne retaliated by giving him a C plus, the consequence being that Jon did not have any scholarship privilege for one semester. The two men hated each other.

“Tell Howland no,” Brienne told Jon urgently. “Look, this isn’t just a paper for class. This is your fucking career.”

“I was thinking of asking Professor Stark but she might refuse because it’s not her field of study.”

“Ask her. Tell Professor Reed first. No, Jon. Absolutely not. No to fucking Thorne. Are you kidding me?”

“Alright, I will. Enough about school.” Jon patted his lips dry with a napkin. “Tell me about the Big Date.”

Brienne smiled happily. “It was better than I thought it could be. That’s all I’m saying.”

Jon looked affronted. “What the fuck, Tarth? Cocktease.”

She sipped her lemonade. “I did tell you I’m not going to delve into certain details. Come on, Jon.”

“Did he at least like the dress?”

Brienne blushed violently. The rip in the skirt was just the beginning of the dress’ destruction. Jaime ripped the rest in half before upending her on the bed. The dress, or what remained of it, was in tatters in the bottom of the trash. 

Seeing her reaction, Jon nodded thoughtfully. Brienne expected him to make a crude comment but instead, he said, “Well, I guess this shows I do know something about women’s clothes.”

She watched him finish the rest of his food quietly. Something was going on but she didn’t know what, exactly. It was the same thing she felt after fucking Jaime this morning. No matter how little time was left, Jaime always cuddled afterwards, touching and kissing her until she needed him again. Something was off, her spidey sense told her. And it wasn’t because he didn’t insist on driving her to school this morning. There was something. . .desperate in how he fucked her, and a fear in his eyes that vanished so quickly it must only be a trick of light. Brienne didn’t know how to ask him about it and tried. Jaime wasn’t forthcoming—but, maybe she was just seeing things. After all, they’ve only known each other for a month. He could only be tired.

Still, she couldn’t help asking Jon, “Jon, when you, uh. . .” she took a sip of her lemonade for courage. “I mean, when you’re with a girl?”

“Yes?”

“Like, I know it’s different with every girl. Like, you know, when you do it? I mean, do you have a usual routine. . .after?”

“After fucking?” 

Brienne blushed at the twinkle in his eyes. “Don’t make fun, alright? I do have a real question.”

“You mean, like, after fucking a woman do I have to do something like take a piss, pick my nose?”

“Fuck, Jon. We’re eating!” Brienne protested, putting down her sandwich in disgust. 

“But that’s what you mean, right? Like do I have a routine that I follow after?” Jon was unfazed and wolfed down the rest of his sandwich.

Brienne shrugged. 

Jon helped himself to the rest of his curly fries. “I don’t know if I do, honestly. Just the usual. Get rid of the condom. Remind the girl she has to leave. If I’m not really into her. If I like her a bit more than the others, I let her stay.”

Brienne made a face. “That’s a jerk move.”

Jon held up his hands defensively. “No judgment, Tarth. Look, I make it clear from the start. I have an early meeting or have stuff to do first thing. If she’s okay with that, we bang. But,” he blushed. Brienne was surprised. He had _never_ blushed. He suddenly leaned close and gave her a serious look.

“Before I go any further, Tarth, I want you to swear that this will never be known by anyone else outside of us.”

“What?”

His gray eyes bored on her like lasers. “Promise me.”

Brienne was confused but said. “Fine. You have my word.”

Jon looked around them before continuing. “If the girl turns out to be alright, like it turns out she’s this cool person after we fuck, I ask her to stay.” 

Surprised, Brienne could only blink at him. Jon sat back and went back to stuffing his face with the fries. “That’s all I do. I ask her to stay, give her coffee in the morning. That’s it. That’s like, only happened once or twice. Why? Did Jaime do something different?”

Brienne frowned and hastily said, “N-No. I was just curious. You know I haven’t been with a lot of guys.” As Jon continued looking at her, she waved her hand. “Really. I was just curious. I needed something for comparison, that’s all.”

“Well, if there’s one thing that I’m pretty sure Jaime Lannister and I could be really compared—“ Jon began, grinning suggestively. Brienne was instantly red and shook her head wildly.

“Finish that sentence and I swear to the Seven I _will_ end you.” 

 

After lunch with Jon, Brienne returned to the library with him to check out some more books for her paper. She read a bit back in her apartment but she had to pack for her stay at Jaime’s. In an overnight bag, she threw pajamas, underwear, a change of clothes. Jaime was thoughtful enough to stock up his bathroom with her favorite soaps and shampoo so she didn’t have to bring her own. She put her deodorant at the top of the pile.

Jaime won’t be home for a couple of hours so she fixed things up in her apartment. She cleaned the bathroom, got rid the fridge of food that had transformed into freaky science experiments in their cartons. Uncle Galladon called and they talked for close to an hour. He wanted to show off the latest crop of vegetables he was grown in their garden back in Tarth. Brienne suddenly missed Evenfall Hall. 

The sunrise she witnessed with Jaime from a hot-air balloon took her breath away but the sun, and the light, over at Tarth was just beyond words. Her old room had a bay window and she loved waking up with the sun in her eyes. The call with Uncle Gal ended with a promise from her to visit soon. She meant it. 

After putting the phone down, she sat on her bed, thinking. Every time she visited Tarth, her uncles and her Dad would fuss over her. Uncle Gal was always nagging her about bringing a boy home. A boy! Jaime was close to forty. Hardly a boy, she thought, indulging in some wishful thinking. 

Though Hyle was her first boyfriend and they got back together a while back, not once did she entertain the idea of bringing him to Tarth, or even introducing him to her family. Maybe as early as college she already knew how wrong he was. In her very limited experience with men, he seemed an angel sent by the Seven. The boy who coaxed her out of her shell, filled her head with compliments. Age and time had to happen for her to realize that even if he did think he loved her, he wasn’t really a good guy. He left her just as when her heart opened up to the idea of someone loving her. When an injury ended her volleyball collegiate career, he was not there at all. His lacrosse teammates had been the one to check on her, as well as her friends from volleyball. No Hyle. It was like she never existed.

Jaime was proving to be not just the man she never thought would have, but bit by bit, he tore down all her assumptions and cautions she had based on her very few relationships—if they could be called that. He was there for her. Generous. He loved her. Admired her. He listened to her and took a genuine interest in her life. 

So why had he looked scared earlier? It was fleeting but Brienne couldn’t forget it.

Maybe he’s just realizing we’re going too fast. He wants to put the brakes on. She could live with that. Just as long as she didn’t lose Jaime. Just the idea. . .she shook her head, shivering a little. One month. One month and her old life was already a blur, probably a dream. It was like she had always been with Jaime.

She returned to her tasks in the apartment. Dust had gathered on some surfaces so she cleaned that too. It was a testament to how often she was at Jaime’s, she thought, putting the rags back in the compartment under the sink. When the apartment was spic-and-span, she took her bags and went downstairs.

Brienne took the bus then walked two blocks to Jaime’s building. She passed by Hot Pie and bought a dozen of their raspberry-and-cream cupcakes, Jaime’s favorite.

The doorman at Empire Building spied her halfway and, despite knowing he shouldn’t, went ahead anyway to help her, waving away her protests and assurances she was alright. She argued all the way to lobby, where another doorman got her bags from his co-worker. Brienne appreciated help, she was grateful but she was stating the truth about being able to handle the bags. There was insistence to help her all the way to the apartment. She looked at the man in the eye and said firmly, “You’ll take it as far as the elevator and that’s it. Thank you.”

When she reached Jaime’s floor, she was surprised to find him leaning against the doorframe, shirt sleeves rolled at the elbow, the green-and-gold necktie loosened. He smiled lasciviously at her and her entire body was as hot as a furnace in an instant.   
“You had them looking out for me,” she accused him, handing him her overnight and glaring at him.

“Couldn’t wait for you,” he said, taking the bag and putting his arm around her waist. His eyes were bright and he looked to be positively up to no good. “Where’s my kiss?”

Blushing, Brienne gently cupped him by the cheek and kissed him on the lips. Jaime groaned and threw his other arm around her but she stopped him.

“Jaime, much as I would like to be ravished, I think we have to put the cupcakes on a safe place first.”

“Cupcakes?”

She smirked. “Raspberry cream, asshole.”

Jaime’s eyes lit up as he released her. “You truly are the _best,_ Brienne Tarth. What the fuck did I do to deserve you?”

“I also ask myself that question,” she responded seriously. Jaime kissed her again before pulling her inside.

While Jaime babbled about calling for pizza, she put the package from Hot Pie on the kitchen counter then went to the bedroom to leave her bags there. It was so freaking domestic, the way they were talking and acting. Maybe that’s what scared Jaime? How. . .normal they were? 

Brienne unpacked her favorite sleep t-shirt and her bright yellow pajamas with tiny guffawing bears. She sat on the bed to pull off her shoe when Jaime entered the room.

“Pizza will be here in thirty minutes,” he told her. “I hope that’s okay?”

“Jaime, when is pizza ever not okay?” She teased then groaned in relief at freeing her feet from the confines of her shoes. 

“Ah, there. The most beautiful words ever said by the girl of my dreams.” Jaime sat down beside her and put an arm around her shoulders. 

Brienne blushed and removed her socks. “Yeah right.”

“You are.” Jaime’s serious voice had her turning to look at him. “I love you, Brienne.”

“I love you too,” she whispered. _Please don’t break up with me. Let’s slow things down. I know we’re going too fast. But please. Don’t break my heart, Jaime Lannister._

Jaime opened his mouth to speak. But Brienne, suddenly scared, shoved him down the bed and got on top of him. Puzzlement and pleasure were on Jaime’s face at her unexpected aggression. He tried to speak again. 

She delayed the inevitable with a sure-fire solution: with a kiss.


	9. Once Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime tells Brienne about his past with Aerys Targaryen.

Jaime and Brienne were exchanging lazy, brushing kisses, flushed with drying sweat coating their bare skins in yet another devastating aftermath when the phone rang. Brienne sat up, her legs still straddling Jaime’s hips but her hands were rushing to cover her breasts with the blankets. Jaime huffed in disappointment. Pushing a hand under the blanket to stroke Brienne’s firm thigh, he reached for the phone with the other. 

It was the lobby. The pizza had arrived and he needed to activate the code that would let the delivery guy into the private elevator. Brienne tucked her hair behind her ears, avoiding his burning emerald gaze on her by looking down at his chest. Jaime smirked and thanked the caller. He put the phone down then prompted her to look at him with a finger under her chin.

“I have to get up.” He pouted.

She held the blankets fast to her chest as he tried to drag them down. Her cheeks had that sexy, post-fucking afterglow that was really testing Jaime’s willpower. Shaking her head at him, she said, “At some point you do.” Then she swung her right leg off him, dropping her body on the bed. She cradled Jaime’s face in her palm as he kissed her on the lips before leaving the bed.   
Brienne turned on her side to watch him. The back muscles of Jaime’s thighs flexed as he bent to pick up his pants from the floor. She blushed as he pulled them on, clearly ignoring the discarded black boxers at his feet. She licked her lips staring at the high, firm shape cheeks of his ass, and was still doing so when he suddenly turned around. Naughty delight lit up Jaime’s face as she shrieked and shoved her head under the pillow. A river of sweat gathered between breasts suddenly and she jumped when a smacking kiss landed on her bare right hip.

Jaime murmured against her skin, “Don’t get up, I’ll bring the pizza here.”

Brienne frowned and quickly turned around, pulling the pillow off her face. “Eat in bed?”

But was already at the door, off to activate the code to grant the pizza guy entry. “Sure!” Then he was gone.

She sat up, still staring after him. She continued to hold the blankets to her chest as she went to overnight bag placed on the bench at the foot of the bed. 

She draped the blankets over her like a full-body tent to rummage in her bag with still some modesty. Huffing and puffing, she hopped and hobbled into the pajamas. Much of the blankets obscured her vision so she nearly tripped pushing her leg in the right crevice. She was still hopping and struggling for balance trying to shoot her left leg in next when Jaime returned to the bedroom, holding the pizza box over his head. 

A hand over his mouth somehow his laugh but his body shook trying to control it. Brienne grunted as she pulled up the pants, straightening up. Jaime set the box down on the dresser by the door with a loud thump and Brienne gasped, the blankets falling to her feet. She turned and saw Jaime grinning at her with his arms crossed. Her cheeks burned as her hands flung to cover her breasts.

“None of that,” he said, going to her. Brienne looked away as he nuzzled her chin before his hands pressed on hers crossed on her breasts. “You’re so beautiful. Let me see you,” he whispered, trying to coax her to free herself.

She had to laugh at the ridiculous, very wrong compliment. “Shut up.” 

He pressed himself against her. He was only wearing pants too. A quick look at them and they would be mistaken for blood relatives. They were both muscular and tall; even when Brienne was hunched, she was still taller. A stuttering breath drifted out of her as he tugged her pajamas down, him falling to his knees to pull them the rest of the way down. Then he was urging one foot out of the flannel puddle, then the other. He whispered for her to look at him so she did, still covering her breasts.

He knelt before her like a supplicant, his voice and touch reverent. “Brienne,” his hands drifted to her wide hips. “You look like the Warrior.”

She would frown if not for the sweet, fiery trail of his palms sliding down her thighs, then behind her leg to press a nibbling kiss beside her knee. “Everything about you is so strong and so, so fucking long,” he marveled, his eyes shining up at her. 

And it was not a problem for him, she realized. He didn’t mind her being taller and gawky, that outside of literature she didn’t really have a lot of other interests. But he will still tell us to slow down, she thought, blushing as he straightened up a bit, still on his knees. It put his face right at the level of her cunt. He was hardly touching her but her cunt, with that familiar, hot aching, was beginning to betray her. 

He smiled up at her. “I can smell you.”

She bit her lip, embarrassed. Seeing this, he pressed his nose against the thick cluster of dirty-blond curls. “You smell so fucking sweet and you’re still so tight. You have the Maiden’s cunt.” He kissed her chastely, there, but the effect was just as potent as his tongue sliding deep as if to discover her most secret essence. Her legs swayed and he gripped her hips to steady her. Then he pulled away and she opened her mouth to protest.

“Much as this,” another kiss to her thatch, “is the slice I would really like to have now, I have to feed you first.” 

He got up and Brienne began to bend down to reach for her pajamas when he stopped her. She flushed all the way to her toes when he said, “My pad, my rules, honey. We eat pizza in bed. Naked.”

“You-You can’t be serious!” Brienne stammered. Maybe it was weird to still be awkward in only her nameday suit around him when she’d been naked with him lots of times. But still. Still! 

Instead of answering, Jaime removed his pants, wiggling his hips. Once he was out of them, he kicked them away, stripper-style. Brienne, who was both laughing and mortified, covered her face. Jaime was laughing too, she discovered when she finally removed her hands. As they sobered up, he had a disbelieving look on his face before he smiled and shook his head, as if in resignation.

“Fuck you for looking so fucking good always,” he said. Then he suddenly groaned, a rough, earthy sound that made her cunt ache some more. “I love you, Brienne.”

He chuckled again when she dove for the blankets on the floor and quickly wrapped herself in them. As he went to get the pizza, she tied the ends of the blanket over one shoulder, wearing it toga-style. As she knotted the ties securely, she watched Jaime stroll towards the bed and put the pizza box there. 

Her legs were weak. Silver fairies danced her stomach in between making champagne toasts. But she still remembered his odd behavior this morning. He didn’t push her away but it felt like he couldn’t get rid of her fast enough. She was probably used to Jaime cuddling afterwards and trying to make her late for school. But there was something, she was sure of it. Not that his behavior was off. Something. . .desperate. He had been worried, she was sure of it. 

Brienne could be blunt too. As Jaime flipped open the box, she took a deep breath.

“Jaime, you don’t think we should slow down?”

He was lifting the soft paper that was between the pizza and the box to pull out packets of hot sauce. At her question, he paused. “What?”

It looked like he stopped breathing for a moment. Brienne held the blankets closer to her chest though they were already secure. She watched as Jaime gathered himself and slowly lowered the hot sauce packets. 

He seemed at a loss for what to do after that. It was unnerving seeing him unsure because he was always so smug and confident. Brienne chewed her lip, wondering if she should have kept her mouth shut when he slowly sat on the bed and looked at her.  
“This is a discussion I’ve been dreading.” Then he paused, flushed and looked around. Brienne guessed what he was looking for. She picked up the pants from where he’d kicked them and held them out to him. She couldn’t top the tremors in her arm and she was quick to retract it once he had the pants. He stood with his back to her. Despite the tension, she felt herself go too warm. His backside really was a work of art. 

Facing her again, Jaime seemed more relaxed. He sat down and bid her to do the same. He gave a small, hesitant smile when she sat close to him. He glanced at the pizza. “It’s going to get cold.”

“We can warm it up.” Then Brienne caught herself. Embarrassed, she added, “I mean, you can.”

“No, Brienne. I don’t want to slow things down. I know things are quite fast but being with you is the rightest thing I’ve ever done. I hope you don’t leave me.” A rawness had settled in his voice at the last sentence.

“I-I thought you wanted to slow things down.” She whispered, torn between wanting to hold his hand and keeping herself together. “Or you wish to break up with me.” _You’ve become the light in my world after only a short time. You’ve taken my heart and all that I am._

“Never.” Then he chided her, “How could you think I when I just told you I love you?”

She shrugged helplessly. “This morning. . .there was something about you. You seemed afraid.”

Jaime nodded. 

“Why? What’s going on?” 

“Kiss me,” he suddenly said.

“What?”

He held out an arm to her. “Brienne,” he said hoarsely. _“Please.”_

“Please tell me you’re not sick,” Brienne said, worried now. She crawled towards him until she was close enough for him to pull her and straddle his lap. As his firm lips neared, she whispered, “Jaime, please—“

His hand around her nape pushed her roughly down. It was a hard kiss, almost painful if not for how much she wanted him, how much she would always want him. She held him close to her, as close as possible, even if her arms would be futile in protecting him. He pushed his tongue in her mouth as hers flicked out to massage his in response. “I love you,” she broke out between brief lapses of their seeking mouths. “I love you, I love you.”

She cupped his face tenderly in her hands as soft green eyes looked up at her. “I don’t deserve you, Brienne.”

She shook her head. “You’re all I want. I love you.”

Jaime looked pained and rested his head against her chest, holding her tight. Her lips kissed his hairline, his hair while she stroked his back comfortingly. 

“I betrayed someone, Brienne.” He pulled away hesitantly at her but his arms remained firm around her. She stilled for a second but her hand on his cheek was enough to prompt him into continuing. “There is no excuse for what I’ve done. You’ve never heard of it?”

She shook her head.

“In a way I’m glad. But whenever my name comes up online, it’s still the first thing to pop up.” He sounded frustrated and Brienne, in her innocence, kissed him again. He sighed and drank deeply from her mouth, as if she was the only source of his strength. When they pulled apart, their lips were pink and swollen. 

“How?” She asked, remembering words. “What happened?”

Jaime looked troubled and she kissed him again. “Jaime, whatever you’ve done, it has had an effect on you. I can see it. I don’t know yet what happened and you don’t have to tell me if it scares you. But I will be here. I’m not going anywhere unless you wish it. I love you. The man you are is probably due to what happened. I love you. I’ll keep telling you until you do away with the nonsense of not deserving me.” 

She spoke firmly, with a certainty that was unlike her. Jaime’ lips quirked in a small smile but he turned serious again.   
“I wasn’t much older than you are now,” he began. “I was working for Aerys Targaryen. He gave me my first job, first a junior copywriter in his agency until. . .until the end.”

Seeing him struggle for words, Brienne thought to remove herself from his lap. Jaime held her fast.

“Having you here, right here, is what’s giving me courage to do this, Brienne. I need—I really need you. I have to do this.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Yes.” He insisted. “I love you but you also need to know what kind of man I am.”

So she remained where she was, straddling his lap and holding, touching him, kissing him softly. Jaime also couldn’t stop touching her. 

“I’ve always wanted my own agency. Every guy in advertising dreams that, of having his own shop. It’s not unusual to poach clients from other agencies—more so from the agency you’re leaving to get them for yours. It’s done all the time. Discreetly, of course, but it’s well-known.”

Brienne was nodding when Jaime suddenly kissed her again. She moaned as he cupped her breasts through the blankets, squeezing flesh that was more muscle than feminine curve. They looked in each other’s eyes, the calm, steady gaze of her blue, he, the bright, anxious greens. Still touching her, he continued.

“When I left Targaryen, I was already creative director. Perhaps it’s insane to leave such a prime position and great pay to strike out on my own but I wanted to. So I started making plans. A month before I was going to turn in my resignation, three of Targaryen’s middle accounts—they weren’t even billing anywhere close to a million dragons, Brienne—had already committed to follow me. With the money I had and Addam and Bronn also ready to leave their jobs in other agencies, it was time. But someone found out what I did. About the accounts.”

Brienne hugged him. “Oh, Jaime.”

He kissed her on the shoulder. “Targaryens and Lannisters have never been friendly but at least they were cordial. When Aerys took me in, news outlets made a big deal out of it. Something along the lines of ‘healing the rift’ or some bullshit ‘new era.’” He sounded bitter. “Varys, Aerys Targaryen’s right hand, found out my plans and told him. I was expecting to get sacked. I had no idea about the damage Aerys was going to inflict on me.”

Jaime took a deep breath and Brienne found herself tensing too. Then he spoke.

He stared off into space and his tone went dark and angry. “Aerys not only denounced me but dragged my name through shit and every garbage he could think of. I know what I’ve done, Brienne, and I know I deserved what he did but still. I was an ingrate, yes. I had betrayed him, yes. But he had a fucking press conference and kept my name in the papers for a bloody year simply because I thought to get three of his clients—a practice that’s always done in advertising. He said,” and this was where his voice broke, “he said he knew, he was just waiting for me to show my true colors, my true allegiance. I was a betrayer through and through, as Lannisters have always been.”

Brienne didn’t grow up in King’s Landing so there was little she knew about the prominent families there, much less the goings-on in their world. She could see Jaime was sorry for what he had done, despite it being a standard practice. She was not in advertising but yes, she knew it was also done. Her heart clenched at the pain on Jaime’s face.

“I couldn’t get a job for close to two years, Brienne. Not just in advertising. Anywhere. I couldn’t be trusted. I had sense of gratitude. No honor.” This was probably a comment made about him and his voice shook in saying it. “Tywin swooped in, trying to get me to work in Lannister Conglomerate but I said no. He couldn’t forgive me and like Aerys. . .my own father. Brienne, he said that Aerys was right. I was an ingrate and I deserved everything I got.”

“Jaime, no,” she said, shaking her head. “No, you can’t. . .Tywin? Your own father?”

He nodded wordlessly and collapsed against her. She would think he had fainted if not for his steady breathing and his hands still stroking her arms, her waist. 

“I didn’t know,” he whispered. “I didn’t know what to do after that. But I couldn’t. . .it wasn’t what I wanted to do, Brienne. All my life I’ve wanted my own agency and despite there being every reason to give up, I just couldn’t. Because everything had already happened. Everything bad.” He looked at her, his eyes bloodshot from tears he refused to shed. “If I had given up, I would have truly lost.”

“Yes. You would have.” Brienne embraced him.

“It still follows me, Brienne. I will never be forgiven. There are days when it’s too much. Even now. I want to scream and just leave everything but I can’t. I won’t. I’ve gone too far to leave all this. I’ve made that dream happen in spite of everything.” He shifted back a bit so he could touch her face. “I refuse to let it get to me but there are days. I can’t. . .it’s never going to end. All that’s stopping me from running away are Addam and Bronn. They stood by me. I can’t betray their friendship.” He kissed her again, deeply. “And you. Since you hit me with your shoe, there has been. . .the struggle is less, Brienne.”

She froze. What could he mean?

His smile was tired. “You chase out the darkness, Brienne. You give me ease. Knowing that you love me has made me want to be a better man. You disagree, but I really do not deserve someone like you. That doesn’t mean I’ll stop trying to be worthy of you. Once all I wanted was to reset, to start all over where my name isn’t mud. That’s different now. All I want is to be a better man who will one day be deserving of you.”


	10. Now We Begin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after, and a peek into the future.

Confessing to Brienne had wrung Jaime out. He remembered suddenly feeling very tired and she had to coax him with take a couple of bites of pizza. She even tried to sway him to eat more with kisses, and as the last resort offering her body. That he remembered in vivid detail. Brienne unable to look at him in the eye as a blush deeper than the previous shade exploded from her body. She stood naked before him, standing in an awkward imitation of a pin-up with a hand on her hip. How every line of her body was determined to succeed with this last offer. 

Jaime would never refuse.

Their kisses were wet, frantic and dirty. Open-mouthed, all tongues and nibbles. He licked the sweat dotted around her long, hard neck while she clutched at his hair and pulled a few golden strands off the scalp. When he drew her over his body, he gasped and granted at the feel of her. She was hard and heavier than she looked, compact and by the gods, when Brienne was unleashed she really could kill him. The tight grip of his fingers left bruises at the back of her buttocks, the muscled contours of her thighs. She cried out when he ate at her mouth for it was so swollen it was glistening and looked to be twice its size. He pinched the tight buds of her nipples to the point of pain but Brienne only grunted and kissed him back, harder. At one point their jaws collided but they kept right on kissing. Even when Jaime’s vision began to dim from the impossible weight of her on him, crushing his ribs, they still fucked. His cock had been at its hardest that despite being on top and in control of the depths he could go inside her, and her honey streaming down her thighs and onto his, she struggled. They both did. But their heads were too hot with lust to stop and Brienne’s eyes had flashed in defiance when he groaned about possibly hurting her. 

As soon as he could get a few inches inside her, that was it. It was madness. Brienne screamed she loved him as she came.  
Afterwards, he drew a blank. They must have fallen asleep right after. They have pushed their bodies to the very limits then a bit more past. 

But when Jaime opened his eyes there was no Brienne. He sat up, grimacing at the pain in his neck and on his ribs, where his giant lady love had sat on him. There was a numbness on his ass and the backs of his thighs, indicating he had been lying on them too long. He got up rubbing the feeling back to those parts, a deep frown etched on his face. Except for the pizza box on the desk, there was no other sign that Brienne had been there.

_She’s left me._

Just as Jaime was contemplating between shouting against the walls for trusting her, he heard the door to the bathroom click open. Who else was to come out by the lady herself, rubbing a towel vigorously on her wet hair and her magnificent body in his deep crimson bathrobe. Jaime’s hand stilled on his ass as a thousand emotions ran through him at finding her there, _with him_ , in _his_ robe. 

Oblivious to what was happening to him, Brienne gave him a shy, beautiful smile. “Good morning.”

Jaime removed his hand from his ass and coughed. He wanted to tear the robe from her and fuck her, right against the dresser. He could also just kiss her, leave her mouth big and swollen. Or he could stay where he was and just love her looking like she belonged, in this room, in his robe, in his arms. To him. His heart rate picked up at the thought so he just stayed where he was.

“How are you?” She asked, draping towel over a chair and going to him. She looked fresh and younger, flushed and still slightly damp from the shower. Her eyes were blue glittering orbs that contributed to his hitching breath.

Jaime swallowed as the familiar, vanilla scent of her washed over him. She was blushing heavily, trying her best (and cutest) to not look at his cock that was steadily rising toward his stomach. Out of consideration to her, he took the blanket from the bed and wrapped it around his waist. 

“You’re still here,” he said softly. 

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Gods, she was intuitive. She knew him well. 

She seemed to hesitate but she still ended up kissing him. Jaime had to stop himself from devouring her, still testing the waters after his revelation last night. It was fucking difficult. Her lips were chapped but warm, a mix of rough and silky. She smelled like pastry fresh from the oven. Her hands on his chest were warm but the robe was cool from the water it had absorbed from her body. He let himself swipe a tongue across her lower lip and tasted toothpaste. Never did he think that its flavor could be so delicious. 

“A boyfriend who’s known to betray people isn’t exactly trustworthy.” He said.

“A man who has clearly atoned for his wrongs and became better for it is one to love,” she countered. “Oh, Jaime,” she said, her blue eyes looking into him—right into his soul. “You’ve carried it inside you for so long, didnn’t you?”

He looked away but nodded.

“I’m glad you told me. That you trusted me enough to tell me.”

She stepped toward him again and wrapped her arms around him. Jaime couldn’t resist sinking against her. She was so resilient. His anchor. 

“But?” He asked, still preparing himself for the worst. He took her face so she was looking at him. 

She looked confused. “But what?”

“Don’t tell me last night didn’t change anything. Aren’t you going to curse me or kiss me? Hit me? You should have done of those things.”

“Why?”

“Haven’t you been listening? I’m not to be trusted.”

“Get the wax out of your ears, Jaime,” Brienne growled. “Or else it’s your age giving you poor hearing.”

She looked so annoyed with him. Jaime suddenly felt himself laughing. He threw his head back and hugged her. “Oh, my love,” he whispered.

“You’re so stupid, you know,” she hissed. His heart skipped a beat. 

Her voice gentled. “You were so brave to tell me, Jaime. I wish my telling you that you shouldn’t let the ghost of the past haunt you to this day is enough to stop you from hating yourself.” She pulled away to search his face with her remarkable eyes. “I wish loving you would show you that you are a much better man than you believe yourself to be. I wish to slay all the demons in here.” She tapped his temple gently. 

“That’s not your responsibility,” he was quick to tell her. She meant every word and Jaime sniffed. His heart hurt but differently now. As if it was stretching, struggling to expand to make room for love he felt for her after it had been locked for so long. “But I need you, Brienne. You won’t slay these,” he cradled her hand to his cheek and kissed her palm. “Just love me.” To lighten the move, he said, “they kind of ping back as if burned when you do. Your love protects me.”

She smiled. A slow stretch of her lips followed by her big, horsey teeth. Her eyes may be wrong on her face but he couldn’t imagine them on any other. “But what of this nonsense about not deserving me? Don’t you think for a minute that maybe it’s me who doesn’t deserve you?” 

He frowned. “Why the fuck would you think that?”

“I know what I look like.”

“You have a problem with looking like mine?” _All those men who rejected you for the most fucked-up reasons deserve to be hanged, he thought. They are worthless men to never know the gift of your eyes, the sweetness of your kiss, your heart. Above all your heart that doesn’t know when to stop giving. They deserve only the cruelest of punishments for hurting you and thinking they deserve better._

She flushed but said, “You know what I mean.” 

“Listen to me. Listen, Brienne, and know this. Whatever it is that you think you lack or are too much of, don’t. You are fucking perfect. You hear me? _Fucking perfect._ You are my dream come to life. I see you and I’m so glad every fucking day that you’re mine. I just want to be yours, Brienne. Yours. Now and always.”

She stared at him, her eyes big and her breath loud and quick. He repeated the word. “Yours.”

He still held her hand to his cheek. He turned to kiss her palm, then down to her wrist, further, until he had to push back the loose sleeve of the robe. He raised his head, silently asking for her permission. Brienne blushed, looking almost beautiful and definitely more perfect. So fucking perfect, he thought as he reached for the ties of the robe and loosened them. As he pushed the heavy garment off her broad shoulders, her whisper caressed his cheek.

“Mine.”

She made her way to the bed, falling on her back and bending a leg. He wrenched off the burning sheets from his body, revealing the full, hungry size of his cock. She was wet. He could smell it. Though every inch of his body was screaming to plunge his cock in, he instead swooped down to take her lips in his. 

He licked and sucked her thick lips, gently bit her jaw before he sucked random freckles scattered on her throat. As Brienne panted loudly above him, he helped himself to her breasts. They were so small they hardly rose from her chest but the aureoles. Gods, they were huge and with long nipples. He sucked one noisily, enjoying her groan and her entire body clenching, her cunt brushing against his leaking erection. He opened his mouth wide to take the entire mound in his mouth before pursing his lips to suck a pink tip, feeling it harden and bloom to a wonderful swell on his tongue. Brienne was sobbing when he moved to her other breast. 

“I love you,” he said between kisses and suckles. He tugged her nipple hard between his teeth and she let out a broken, watery whimper. “I fucking love you. I need you. How I need you, Brienne.”

By the time he was moving down her heaving body, Jaime was crazed with want and was having trouble seeing straight. He only made out flashes—pale hair, stunning blues, freckles upon freckles, the wet, swollen tip of a nipple. He spread her wide open and as the sweet-salty scent of her arousal rose up at him, his world cleared. His want intensified. He stared at his woman’s cunt.

With her legs wide open, he could see everything. The hairs were damp and glistening with her honey. Her clit was a hard red button and he knew that the tiniest of flicks would make her shatter—Brienne was that responsive. His cock was aching so badly but he didn’t want to rush. He wanted to relish and look, and feel. Be enslaved by his senses.

So he submitted to them. He looked his fill, counting the droplets of her honey on her cunt hair. Gently slid the pad of his finger tip on her inner labia to discover her thick and very wet with her desire. Brienne whined and begged for his cock and he kissed her on the thigh to relax her. 

With straining gentleness, he introduced a finger in her cunt, pumping it, then another. Brienne’s eyes widened as if it was the first time. Yes, she was very wet but despite his fingers inside her, she was still tight. He continued fucking her with his digits as his lips clamped around her clit.

Brienne gasped. “Jaime!”

He couldn’t resist not looking at her so he raised his head. His thumb swirled around her clit and she closed her eyes. Her hips were moving against his thrusting fingers. “Please,” she begged. “Oh, Jaime, please. _Please fuck me._ ”

But not yet. Guided solely by instinct and lust, Jaime pulled out one slick finger from her cunt. Keeping his eyes on her face red and scowling in frustration, he stretched the finger towards another orifice below her cunt. He smiled as Brienne froze, the airy brush of his finger in the surrounding area an entirely new sensation. He played with her clit with his thumb and she groaned, her body slackening. Jaime pressed his advantage, pushing a finger gently inside.

“Oh.” Brienne’s eyes were big and he felt her resistance. She started wriggling. “What—Jaime—“

“Just concentrate on what I’m doing to you. How I’m making you feel.” He requested, his voice sounding ragged.

“Um, I—I’ve never—“

“Good.” He said then claimed her clit again with his lips.

It didn’t take long for Brienne to scream. She came and her released poured right on his hand, making the finger pumping deeply in her orifices slicker. Her hips crashed against his hand, wet flesh and muscles thumping hard against each other.   
The motions of her hips had softened when Jaime pulled his fingers out. He took a condom from the drawer and rolled it on. Brienne, having recovered a bit, didn’t have long to appreciate the sight of him kneeling between her legs, holding his cock. Jaime entered her in one thrust, plunging deep in the tightness of her cunt despite her release still dripping out of her. She sighed, mouth hanging open, her eyes closed. 

He smoothed her hair from her eyebrow. “Are you alright?”

She nodded, opening her eyes. “Please, Jaime.” She wrapped a leg around his hip. “Please.”

“I love you,” he told her. “Never forget that for a second.”

“I love you too.”

Her words got him harder. He winced at the merciless clutch of her flesh. She wailed. It was too much. Too good. “So fucking perfect,” he gasped before swinging his hips back to pull out and thrusting back inside her. He surrendered to the demands of his body, heeding Brienne’s breathless, loving pleas.

 

An hour later, Jaime entered closet. His hair was still damp from the shower and droplets clung to his skin. He rifled through his suits, selecting a deep navy set. From a drawer he picked out a starched shirt, then from another drawer, a tie. He glanced longingly at the hamper where yesterday’s clothes were piled neatly, including the green-and-gold tie. 

He felt relaxed and light. Free. Yes. That was how he felt. For the first time in years, he was free. It was no lie telling Brienne that his betrayal of Aerys would always haunt him. But this knowledge wasn’t as grim as it was yesterday. He knotted the necktie as he faced the mirror, thinking all the while how life had been so much easier since Brienne kicked her way into his life.

He was about to leave when something caught his eye. Curious, he turned around, knowing something was amiss. Or rather, he realized, pausing and his eyes brightening at what he saw. Something had been added.

Boyfriends would give their girlfriends a drawer or a shelf to for their clothes. But Jaime was unlike any other boyfriend. He didn’t just give Brienne a shelf, but a section of the closet that came with a couple of shelves and drawers. Noting that she went back to the same clothes after a couple of weeks or three, factoring how he saw her nearly every day, the contents of her closet would fit this space. With lots of room for more clothes left.

He had been thinking of nagging Brienne some more to actually leave clothes at her own will instead of him finding excuses by pretending to ‘lose’ them. He also realized she needed time but waiting chafed at him. While he was telling her about Aerys, he was wondering whether the space he allotted for her would ever be filled. She was the only woman he made room for, the only woman he wished to say forever.

Really, the only woman he wanted and loved.

He touched the pair of jeans she had been wearing yesterday. Now it was folded around a hanger and hanging in the closet. He opened the drawer and found the pajamas she had put on yesterday and a threadbare t-shirt to go with it. A closer look at the pajamas revealed them to be bears. An amused smile touched his lips, remembering that night at Ye Olde Gods just a month ago. A bear there was, indeed. 

She had left some underwear too, he saw after opening another drawer. Oh, this was promising indeed. A new beginning for them. 

He walked out, buoyed once again but that feeling of freedom, of a kind of happiness he never thought could be real. It was all due to Brienne. Brienne who loved him despite the man he was. 

With Brienne, he was being given another chance to be good man. 

He went to the kitchen and this was where he found her. She was dressed in a short-sleeved navy shirt with a tight white tank under it and comfortable-fitting jeans cuffed at the ankle. She wore her black Mary Janes. Jaime was once again struck by how young and fresh she looked, even when she was scowling at the microwave oven. It dinged and she grinned, reaching for a big purple plate. 

“Good morning,” he told her, heading for the coffee maker. He took two mugs from the cupboard and poured the brew in them.  
“Hello.” She said, taking out pizza slices from the microwave. “Have you ever had pizza for breakfast?”

“I have a feeling that you expect a certain answer, except that my real answer will disappoint you.” He went to the table and set the mugs down. Brienne put the plate of heavenly-smelling pizza at the center then small plates for them. Jaime played with a short lock of her hair. “No. Never.”

She shook her head. “That’s like, the first thing you do when you live on your own. Eat junk food for breakfast.”

“I do eat junk for breakfast. I love Wildfyre Bombs,” he replied, referring to the popular cereal brand.

Brienned looked aghast. “That’s for children. The amount of sugar in it could kill an elephant!”

“Don’t judge. How sure are you? An elephant’s overweight, hardly gets any exercises and its cholesterol level is beyond Seven Heavens.” He patted his flat stomach proudly before sitting down. “Unless you’re think I’m fat.”

Brienne blushed and sat down. “No Of course not. Well, I guess that’s the ultimate in junk food.”

“So your delinquency has only gone as far as pizza?” He put a slice on her plate then for himself. He grinned. “Fuck, even when you’re being bad you’re good, aren’t you?”

“Shut it.” She told him, but her eyes were twinkling.

Gods, he loved seeing her first thing in the morning. Really. In bed. Sitting next to him at breakfast. He took her hand and she smiled at him, pressing a kiss on his shoulder before putting her head there. He could get used to mornings like this. Hells, he already was.

“So, now that we have the first date out of the way, may I invite you for a second one?” He asked as she brought her slice towards her. He grinned, suddenly hit with devilry. He caught her by the wrist and steered the pizza towards him so he could take a bite. Tomato sauce, olives and mozzarella. Perfect, but not as perfect as the woman beside him. Brienne rolled her eyes as he chewed before taking a bite for herself.” 

“Wasn’t last night the second?”

“Brienne, I hope you don’t consider that a date. It was emotionally stressful. Except the part where I was fucking you, of course. That always revives me.” He took her by the wrist again to get the last half of the pizza. “Fucking good, this one. Not as good as your cunt, though.”

He felt her blush, being that she was leaning against him. “I liked last night. Thank you for trusting me, Jaime. I can only imagine how difficult it was.” She said, looking up at him. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He said seriously. “You’re my life, Brienne.”

“Oh, you.” She teased as he took his own pizza from the plate. She pulled his pizza-wielding pizza towards her before taking a bite. “Oh, fuck. Jaime, it’s sooo good.”

“So, how about it? Second date?”

She sat up, pulling away from him a little. “What do you have in mind?”

Jaime grinned. “I was thinking of Braavos and gambling.”

“Fly to the Braavos? Jaime, I know you’re rich but dates don’t have to extravagant often. Certainly not like that.” 

“Fine. What do you suggest?”

“We don’t have to go on fancy dates all the time. Dates are all about being with each other. It’s what brings it down to earth but also special.”

“Alright. We’ll do it your way,” Jaime said, affecting making her a grugding offer. “But we’ll do it right this time. I’ll pick you up from your apartment.

“There’s no need for that. I can just meet you.”

“So, where?”

“Honestly? Jaime, I would be more than happy to just visit a bookstore then dinner afterwards. It can be in a barbecue place, or Wyman Manderly, you like. Jaime, I'll be happy if we went out for cheeseburgers. I just want to be with you. You and a few new books.”

Jaime kept that in mind. The following afternoon, he picked her up from school, insisting that he will get her from there no matter what. Brienne noted his suit attire and lamented that she was still stuck in a long-sleeved t-shirt and jeans. 

“You look fantastic, I swear,” he told her. She looked adorable and made to be kissed. 

He did take her to the bookstore alright—the Citadel in Oldtown, the biggest bookstore of Westeros, which was next to the biggest library. To get to Oldtown, Jaime borrowed the family airplane. Brienne thought it was outrageous—that is, until the rental car they were in pulled up in front of the famous bookstore. 

Brienne’s eyes bugged out. Jaime laughed, basking in her awe. Sure, she complained this was way over-the top, or at least tried to. 

He was expecting her to run ahead toward the store. Instead, Brienne took him by the hand. As he followed her, letting her pull and steer him so while he wore the idiotic grin of a besotted fool, he saw himself somewhere in time, probably a long time from now. Brienne was holding his hand and pulling him behind her. 

She turned around to smile at him. “Come with me, Jaime.”

“Always.” He answered. She would find out much, much later that when spoke this word, it wasn’t just a reply. It was a vow for all time, and he was never letting go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! It's done!
> 
> I'm so thankful for your comments and kudos. I really appreciate it when someone drops me a line. So, please, keep those comments coming because us writers love encouragement! 
> 
> Until next time.

**Author's Note:**

> You made it! Yay!
> 
> Finally uploading this. This was written months ago but I couldn't remember the file name. Now it's up! 
> 
> My Valentine's gift to the fandom. I hope you like it.


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